There comes a time in a man’s life when he wants to try and recapture aspects of his youth, and in the case of my partner Tom it has come now – at the age of 35.
He is really acting out some of the worst moments of his teenage years and I don’t know what to do with him. He goes out drinking with his work buddies on a Friday night and I am never invited. He wakes up the next morning with a shocking hangover and it happens every week without fail.
A few weeks ago, he was throwing up all over the bathroom floor after one of his Friday night “boys’ nights” – but I wonder if it’s just his friends or whether there are women too. He often reeks of women’s perfume and laughs it off by telling me he was in a crowded pub. Not exactly COVID-safe, but I’d say Tom doesn’t really care about anyone but himself.
READMORE:‘My proposal was almost upstaged by hundreds of drunk teens’
A woman’s husband is having a mid-life crisis that is taking his family down with him. (Getty)
Our daughters think their dad is adorable and funny but they don’t know what he puts me through. My mother said it’s a practice run for me for when I really do have teenagers in the house.
He called me recently around 2am, saying he needed me to pick him up. His mates from him had left him alone, he was drunk and could n’t find his wallet from him, and he clearly was too drunk to realize his bank card from him was on his phone from him, so he demanded I pick him up .
This was not ideal for me as it was the night before I had a big presentation at work. Let’s just say I was not impressed.
The next day he tells me he had no memory of even calling me, so that’s how drunk he was. I’ve read him the “riot act” so many times and it goes in one ear, out the other.
I’m really losing patience with him. I do love him very much but I deserve better than a man who still acts like a big kid.
She thinks it may be time to issue an ultimatum: grow up, or get out. (Getty Images/iStockphoto)
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I’ve told him he’s not setting a good example for our children and he agrees. He promises to stop partying so much, but then weeks later he will be out again behaving like a teenager. He even got into a fist fight with a work colleague who was also off his face at the time. I’ve had enough!
I spoke to a wise friend of mine who said I need to give Tom an ultimatum: either he shows up as a committed husband and father and quits the drinking and big social life, or he leaves.
I don’t think I want to be that harsh, but I do need to let him know that I can’t cope with the endless worry about him. What if he gets into a fight when he’s drunk and there are serious injuries? I get into a panic when I wake up early on a Saturday morning and he isn’t in bed with me. This isn’t something I should be going through when I’m already so stressed juggling work and two kids.
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“Think like a plant,” Paul Saladino, known to the internet as Carnivore MD, tells me from the confines of a YouTube video.
He’s trying, as he often does, to convince the world that vegetables are probably not good for us, and a diet consisting almost completely of meat is the best way to “thrive.”
“If we think about this intuitively, high level, without getting into the science… plants are going to put all their defense chemicals in those parts of the plant” Saladino says.
It’s one of his few video posts in which he wears a shirt. In fact, it’s a habit amongst carnivore influencers to appear shirtless, barefoot, and generally as closely resembling “our ancestors” as possible.
Another influencer, known as Liver King, addressing his followers as “primals”, roars to the camera about the merits of going shoeless.
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“You get connected, anchored to the earth, [because] why would you ever let your environment dominate you?” Liver King says.
Content like this is the most extreme expression of carnivore culture online. Many of these influencers have monetized their social media presence and sell their own nutritional supplements.
It’s a dizzying suckhole of raw-testicle-slurping machismo, diet pseudo-science, and do-your-own-research-ism.
The uncompromising rhetoric of the online carnivore community is a long way from the reality of the diet for Curtis Sironen, a professional rugby league player who describes himself as “a convert.”
“I was basically fully carnivore for probably eight months when Sydney was really hit by COVID,” Curtis says.
At the time he was playing in the NRL for the Manly Sea Eagles, and battling chronic injuries.
“I’d sort of come to the point where I was like I’ll try anything and I’m sort of desperate,” he says.
The owners of a recovery center he was associated with pitched him the carnivore diet, and initially Curtis was skeptical.
“I was like ‘no way’. Like, it just sounded ridiculous. I wouldn’t be full enough, wouldn’t have the energy.”
Curtis Sironen (R) playing NRL in 2019.(AAP: Dave Hunt )
Ultimately though they convinced him to try it, and put him in touch with a self-described “ancestral nutritionist”, who sent through some meal plans.
“[They] sort of looked wild, like it was basically fasting from 8pm to midday every day and then breaking a fast with three or four rib eye steaks with bone broth,” he says.
But Curtis says the results came quickly, and they were significant.
“Within honestly, probably a fortnight, I started just feeling the effects… and those sort of achy little pains starting to wear off, which [was] sort of my goal.”
What nutritional experts say about the carnivore diet
Emma Beckett, a nutrition and food scientist from the University of Newcastle, like many in her field has strong reservations about the diet.
“There are potential consequences in terms of eating too much meat, and if you’re only eating meat, it’s very likely you will be eating too much meat,” Dr Beckett says.
“So too much meat presents risks of things like too much saturated fat … which increases our risk of heart disease and cardiovascular disease.”
She also warns it may mean missing out on important things like Vitamin C, fiber, and Vitamin K.
The Australian Dietary Guidelines recommend eating from five different food groups, which includes vegetables and legumes; fruits; meats, poultry and fish; and dairy products.
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Dr Beckett is the first to admit that any diet can be done well or poorly.
The problem with a poor diet though, is that the worst effects may not be felt for decades.
“The body’s really good at what we call homeostasis … keeping things in the normal situation,” she says.
“So we’re eating not just for our health today, but we’re eating for our health in … 10 years, 20 years, hopefully.”
A common refrain in the carnivore community is that mainstream nutrition and food science is dominated by orthodoxy, and the proper studies are prevented by vested interests.
But Dr Beckett says the view comes from a misunderstanding of what nutrition science is.
“We don’t make decisions in nutrition off the back of single studies or segregating people into different groups,” she says.
“We make decisions based on the body of evidence, a large amount of evidence, a great number of studies.
“So we don’t typically study people on the carnivore diet because that would be unethical, because we know from the body of evidence that we have already that putting people on a carnivore diet could do them harm.”
And if that sounds like a catch-22 to you, then you might be starting to appreciate a fraction of the persuasive force animating this movement.
A moment of extremes
I spoke to Matt Klein, a US based cultural strategist, about what’s driving the enthusiasm for meat at this moment in history.
“I mean, we are in a moment of extremes,” he says.
“Culture exists as tensions … so when we see the rise of veganism, you’re going to see the pull or the inverse and that being the all meat diet.”
He points to the democratization of health information online.
“We’re living in a metaverse or multiverse of truth, right? You could choose your own adventure.”
In general, Matt says, institutional trust is declining and conspiracy theories are on the rise.
“And this is not to call diets conspiracy theories, but it is a matter of power to the people and … determining what is best for ourselves,” he says.
Of course that doesn’t account for everyone who takes up the carnivore diet, but for Matt, there is a larger cultural sentiment underpinning the movement.
“In a moment of cultural instability, we are seeking resolution, morals and like minded people to surround ourselves with.”
Ange Lavoipierre is an award-winning journalist, writer, and comedian. She’s the host and EP of the ABC’s new culture podcast, Schmeitgeist.
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In a recent interview, Federline made some major claims.
I have told the Daily Mail that Spears hadn’t seen her two sons in months.
“The boys have decided they are not seeing her right now,” he told the publication. “It’s been a few months since they’ve seen her from her. They made the decision not to go to her wedding from her.”
He also went on to say that Spears’ father, Jamie, “saved” her life by controlling her financials.
“I saw this man that really cared, and really cares about his family and wanting everything to be OK,” he explained. “When Jamie took over, things got into order. I saved her life from her.”
Federline also explained that their two children have struggled with the details of the conservatorship.
“They’ve had a lot of questions about it,” he said. “I don’t know that I can answer all of them for them but I just tried to explain to them that your mom needed help, you know, and the people were in play to try to make that happen, to make it better. “
He added: “This whole thing has been hard to watch, harder to live through, harder to watch my boys go through than anything else. It’s been tough. It’s the most challenging thing I’ve ever had to do in my life.”
Spears’ nude photos, claims Federline, has been an issue for their two sons.
Listen to The Spill, Mamamia’s daily entertainment podcast. Post continues after audio.
“I try to explain to them, ‘Look, maybe that’s just another way she tries to express herself.’ But that doesn’t take away from the fact of what it does to them.
A young woman has detailed how she met her now-boyfriend the old-fashioned way – after her “wingman” dad spontaneously set them up at a pub.
Alice James, a television publicist from Melbourne, made the decision to quit dating apps in early June after she was fed up with the dating scene.
WATCH VIDEO ABOVE: How Alice’s dad set her up on a date
For more Relationships related news and videos check out Relationships >>
“I just wasn’t having fun, I was feeling like crap, it was taking its toll and I just thought, I’m just going to take the pressure off for a while,” she said in a now-viral TikTok video.
Just three weeks later, the 30-year-old was enjoying a casual night out with her dad at the pub when they spotted an attractive stranger sitting at the bar.
“Fast forward, I was sitting at the local pub with my dad, we were just having a drink, talking s***, as you do with your dad,” Alice recalled.
Alice James met her now-boyfriend after her “wingman” dad set them up. Credit: Alice James
“And he’s like, ‘I don’t know if you’ve noticed but there’s a real hottie sitting at the bar.’
“I’m like, ‘I know dad, I clocked him when I walked in, he’s a total spunk’.
“Dad’s like, ‘Oh, leave it with me’.”
Stepping in as the “ultimate wingman”, the matchmaking dad wandered over to the man.
“They started chatting about footy and all that stuff and then dad’s like, ‘Hey are you single?’ And the dude is like, ‘Yes I am’, and dad’s like, ‘Well… she’s my daughter, she’s single too’, ”she said.
exchanged numbers
“Anyway we all start chatting and then he’s like, ‘I’ve got to go’ and dad’s like, ‘You can’t leave, you haven’t exchanged numbers’.”
Alice said her dad then walked over to the bar to grab a notepad and pen.
“We both exchanged numbers… and then we’ve been talking,” she said.
“Now we have a date.”
WATCH THE VIDEO BELOW: How dad acted as the ‘ultimate wingman’ for his daughter
Dad acts as ‘ultimate wingman’ for his daughter.
Dad acts as ‘ultimate wingman’ for his daughter.
After their first date, Alice confirmed she had an “awesome” time with the man.
“It was a fantastic date,” she said.
“He is very attractive, he’s super successful, very intellectual and good banter.
“All in all, a good date. I’m just trying to be real chill about it because chill is something that I’m not.
‘Dad did real good’
“But I’m trying to be chill and take it one day as it comes.
She added: “Good work dad… Dad did real good.”
Alice was enjoying a night out with her dad at the pub when he decided to set her up with a stranger. Credit: Alice James
After multiple dates, Alice started gushing about the man on social media.
“He’s so nice,” she said.
“It’s very lovely to spend time with him.”
WATCH THE VIDEO BELOW: Alice confirms man at pub is now her boyfriend
Woman confirms the man her dad set her up with is now her boyfriend.
Woman confirms the man her dad set her up with is now her boyfriend.
More than a month later, Alice shared an exciting update, alongside her dad, on social media.
“Hey dad, remember when we went out to a local pub and you were my wingman and you got a guy’s phone number for me?” she asked, as her dad said “yes”.
“Well last night, he asked me to be his girlfriend.”
‘He’s now my boyfriend’
In another video, Alice said her boyfriend did something that left her “too stunned to speak”.
“So I was driving my boyfriend to pick up his car and he was sitting in the passenger seat. He’d bought us blueberries for breakfast and so he started giving me blueberries to eat as I’m driving,” she recalled.
Alice said she and her date hit it off and they are now in a relationship. Credit: Alice James
“Then I look at him and noticed he’s sorting through the blueberries and I was like, ‘What are you doing?’ and he was like, ‘I’m just picking out the ones that are juicy and not bruised to give to you and I’m eating the bad ones.
Amazed with his gesture, Alice urged: “Girls, do not settle, there’s good ones out there.”
‘Can your dad wingman me?’
Her original video has been viewed more than 1.3 million times – with many praising her dad as “the best wingman ever”.
“My dad would never, can I borrow yours please?” one joked.
Another said: “Wow! Can your dad please come wingman for me?”
While one added: “If your dad can find you this gem then surely my dad can find me mine.”
australian actor Jacob Elordi is joining the likes of his co-star Sydney Sweeney in speaking about money troubles – though this admission might not garner as much backlash as the actress’ did.
In an interview with G.Q. magazine, the 25-year-old euphoria star revealed that prior to booking his starring role on the HBO series – but after the release of Netflix’s The Kissing Boothin which he played the leading man – he moved to Los Angeles and crashed on a friend’s couch for a few weeks, and when he wasn’t sleeping there in the San Fernando Valley, he was sleeping in his 2004 Mitsubishi on Mulholland Drive.
“I wasn’t booking jobs,” he told the publication. “I think I had – I don’t know, $400 or $800 left in my bank account – and euphoria was my last audition before I went home for a little while to make some money and recover.”
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Jacob Elordi’s name started being recognized after his role in The Kissing Booth, but it was Euphoria that truly shot him to fame. (Getty)
Even after he booked the role of Nate Jacobs in euphoriafor a while, Elordi was still living in his car, recalling around the time the pilot for euphoria was being shot: “My car was like a hoarder’s, stacked with boxes and coat hangers and things.”
It was a producer for euphoria that noticed Elordi’s predicament, and ultimately got him a room at West Hollywood’s Standard.
“I got really lucky,” he told the publication. “Which is just an LA story, do you know?”
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Elordi also opened up about how, following the release of The Kissing Booth in 2018, he almost quit acting for good – the franchise has had mixed but notably mocking reviews, and when the first film was released, Elordi was dating actress Joey Kingwho played his on-screen love interest.
All the attention on his personal relationship with King made Elordi rethink whether he really wanted to be famous.
“[It] might sound quite sensitive and dramatic, but I am sensitive and I’m very dramatic,” he told the publication. “I hated being a character to the public. I felt so far from myself.”
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Elordi ultimately decided to continue pursuing his acting dreams, but says he still struggles with what comes with fame – namely, being followed by the paparazzi.
“It felt like, all of a sudden, I was a poster,” he said of the attention on him. “Like I was a billboard. It felt like it was for sale.”
“Then my brain went through the f–king wringer. Like, I wasn’t sure if I was genuine. It really skews your view. It creates a very paranoid way of living.”
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Longtime friend shares Chris Hemsworth’s ‘awkward’ formal photo
Kyle Sandilands has offered a first glimpse of his newborn son Otto.
The baby was born shortly after the radio host frantically left his show, mid-program, when he learned fiancée Tegan Kynaston had gone into labor on Thursday morning.
WATCH THE VIDEO ABOVE: First look at baby Otto Sandilands
For more Celebrity related news and videos check out Celebrity >>
“The baby is perfect. Everything is wonderful. He was just under three kilos,” the new dad said from the hospital live on KIIS radio on Friday.
He said he did not cry when Otto was born but he “felt the need to cry, like when you’re catching your breath, but thought, I can’t pull this off in front of medical professionals”.
Speaking about the birth, the radio host revealed Otto was born via C-section.
Kyle Sandilands wheels in his new baby. Credit: Supplied
As his son came into the world, Sandilands described a “big fountain of urine that sprayed across the theatre”.
Kyle said he cut the umbilical cord, “but blood shot out – they don’t tell you there’s blood in it”.
“Tegan’s just gone to sleep, I’m planning on running next door and stealing the baby to show you,” the new dad said.
As Sandilands wheeled his new son in, Jackie Henderson and the rest of the KIIS team yelled out, “Aw look at him!”
Kyle Sandilands shows off baby Otto. Credit: Supplied
“Here he is,” an excited Sandilands said.
“My mum said, ‘Oh he looks exactly like you’.”
Henderson agreed, “I think it does look like you, Kyle.”
Sandilands said the nurses told him the baby will “change his appearance every day.”
“I think he’s absolutely gorgeous now,” the radio host sweetly said.
Kyle Sandilands speaks live on air. Credit: Supplied
“Do you think you’re producing a supermodel here, mate?” one of the producers joked.
“That love (that everyone talks about) is really immense anxiety and having no idea – I am out of my depth,” the new dad admitted.
“It’s the greatest day of my life, she’s like a super mum,” he said of his fiancée Kynaston.
On Thursday, the 51-year-old quickly said his goodbyes to the KIIS team before removing his headphones – as he rushed out the door to be by Kynaston’s side in hospital.
Kyle Sandilands leaves the radio show. Credit: Supplied
‘It’s time!’
Shortly after, co-host Henderson confirmed on the show the couple had welcomed their baby boy after receiving a text message from Sandilands’ manager Bruno Bouchet.
“Little Otto was born this morning. Mum and bub both doing well,” the text from Bouchet read.
“Kyle’s beyond excited.”
Earlier on Thursday, Sandilands said he was broadcasting from home when he received the best personal news.
“I might have to leave the show and go to the hospital,” he abruptly said during the radio show.
Jackie O Henderson reacts to the news. Credit: Supplied
Kyle leaves mid-broadcast for the arrival of his baby.
Kyle leaves mid-broadcast for the arrival of his baby.
“It’s time? Oh, it’s time!” co-host Jackie O Henderson was heard saying from the studio.
“It’s time,” Sandilands confirmed.
The studio broke out in applause as the dad-to-be prepared to leave.
“Calm down, we don’t want the kid coming out too soon,” Sandilands joked.
Kyle and Tegan, who began dating in 2019, have already decided on names for both genders. Credit: Kyle and Jackie O
“You ready?” he was heard saying ‘off mic’ before telling the team, “Guys I’m so sorry, I feel very unprepared – I don’t even know if…”
“It’s okay,” Henderson reassured him, asking “Have you got your bag packed and everything?”.
“Yes, I’ve got my bag,” he replied.
“I’ve got to run, I feel like I’m abandoning you,” Sandilands added, before rushing off.
Kyle and Tegan find out they’re having a boy. Credit: kyleandjackieoshow/Instagram
Boy or girl?
After announcing the pregnancy news in February, Sandilands and Kynaston celebrated by throwing a gender reveal party on a boat in the middle of Sydney Harbour.
Courtesy of the Kyle and Jackie O Show’s Instagram, the excited couple was seen arriving on the boat as a live band played.
Pictures were shared of the four-tier gender reveal cake, ‘baby Sandilands’ decor, an elaborate candy bar – all in shades of blue and pink.
Kyle and Tegan before the gender reveal. Credit: kyleandjackieoshow/Instagram
The parents-to-be found out live on air that they were expecting a little boy.
The gender was announced by plans that flew over their boat spewing blue smoke.
Live on air, you could hear the crowd cheer as the plans flew past.
“We did expect a girl but we’re very, very happy,” Sandilands said after the plans flew past.
WATCH THE VIDEO BELOW: Kyle Sandilands announces the birth of his unborn child
Kyle Sandilands announces the birth of his unborn child.
Kyle Sandilands announces the birth of his unborn child.Some snapshots from the gender reveal party. Credit: kyleandjackieoshow/Instagram
Sandilands and Kynaston, who began dating in 2019, shared that they had decided on potential baby names.
Announcing to his listeners on February 13, Sandilands said: “We’re having a baby!” prompting the entire KIIS FM studio team to cheer.
“We are having a friggin’ baby. I couldn’t be happier,” he added.
Co-host Henderson – who’s a mother to daughter Kitty, aged 10 – told the couple she was “so happy”, and told them their lives would soon change forever.
Kyle Sandilands announces his baby’s gender in Sydney harbour.
Kyle Sandilands announces his baby’s gender in Sydney harbour.
‘He’s very emotional about it’
Speaking on air, Kynaston said Sandilands had been “excellent” since she’s fallen pregnant.
“He’s been very emotional… very happy about it,” she said.
Sandilands said his manager Bruno found it challenging to deflect questions from the media after Kynaston was spotted on February 2 with a “slight bump”.
Announcing to his listeners, Kyle said: “We’re having a baby!” prompting the entire KIIS FM studio team to cheer. Credit: KIIS
The couple announced their engagement live on air in January after he proposed in Port Douglas.
“I apologize to the women of the world, as I am officially off the market,” Sandilands said at the time.
He told his listeners Kynaston had “no clue” the proposal was coming.
The 50-year-old went into detail about his elaborate proposal plans that were set to feature fireworks, live music, an array of candles and a lavish meal.
However, not everything went according to plan.
A still from the proposal video posted to Instagram. Credit: kyleandjackieoshow/Instagram
The KIIS FM host had organized for singer-songwriter Conrad Sewell to fly in from overseas and perform the couple’s favorite song while Sandilands got down on one knee.
The radio host shared that “two days before the proposal, Conrad rang and he was very upset because he had caught COVID.”
“I couldn’t postpone it because there were chefs, fireworks and I had hired a venue,” Sandilands said.
Despite the complications, Sandilands told listeners the proposal went ahead without live music, explaining to then-girlfriend Kynaston that they were attending a pop-up art show.
Kyle Sandilands, left, and Tegan Kynaston, right. Credit: Getty Images/Facebook
“When we got there, we got out, I swung the door open and they played the Conrad song. There were candles and soft lighting,” Sandilands said.
Following the romantic proposal, the couple watched the fireworks display alongside close family and friends.
Kynaston, who is 15 years younger than her fiancé, met Sandilands as his personal assistant in 2019.
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EITHERne evening during Melbourne design week, I was drinking warm prosecco in a dimly lit third-floor office that overlooked Russell Street in the city’s centre. A friend had asked me to accompany her to the exhibition opening being held there. Of course, the office belonged to an architecture firm.
The crowd was stylish in a typically Melbourne way. There were black-rimmed glasses, workman’s jackets and designer sneakers in every corner. But as I scanned the photographers and brand directors in attendance, I realized at least half the room was wearing the floating, sculptural silhouettes of Issey Miyake, easily distinguishable by the tiny, perfect pleats that somehow give form and also take it away.
Miyake died this week at the age of 84, leaving behind a formidable legacy. He founded his studio de el in the early 1970s and was one of the first Japanese designers to present collections in Paris. He began to experiment with pleating in the late 1980s, finally patenting the heat-pressing technique that created permanent pleats in polyester in 1993.
A model wears Issey Miyake from Melbourne boutique Shifting Worlds during Melbourne fashion week in 2019. Photograph: Mackenzie Sweetnam/WireImage
An Issey Miyake design from Shifting Worlds. Photograph: Mackenzie Sweetnam/WireImage
This formed the basis of Pleats Please, the line of clothing that is arguably his most recognisable, with its loosely tapered pants, tops with the shoulder and sleeve rounded into one, and rippling calf-length shift dresses. This look, often accessorized with his signature Bao Bao bag, has become synonymous with Melbourne style (to the point of occasional parody).
That each shape can be worn with something sporty such as a sneaker, or something delicate like a strappy sandal, is a credit to the joy, universality and freedom Miyake determinedly imbued in his garments.
Nayna wearing her Issey Miyake Bao Bao bag at the National Gallery of Victoria, Melbourne Photograph: @naynav / Instagram
Robyn Healy, a professor of fashion design at RMIT University, says this fluidity is why his designs have been part of Melbourne’s fashion culture since the early 1980s. “Dressing in clothes that were not based on European traditions of making, gender or season alignment appealed to Melburnians,” she says. In contrast to the body consciousness one might typically associate with Australian style, residents of the country’s self-proclaimed cultural capital “were attracted to clothing that draped, wrapped or hung around the body”.
Shifting Worlds staff member Su wears Issey Miyake Pleats Please pants on the shop floor in Melbourne. Photograph: Shifting Worlds
Lucinia Pinto carried Issey Miyake at several boutiques she owned across the city from the 1970s to the early 2000s. She is firm in her belief that his designs influenced the way Melburnians dress. “The clothing appealed to people who appreciated art… So, it became a mainstay of Melbourne architects, for instance, who loved the detailed construction and the fit.”
In 1997, she collaborated with Miyake to open Australia’s first and only Issey Miyake store in South Yarra. She describes it as a vaulted space, made up of lime-green wall panels and a white vinyl floor. “It was the perfect backdrop for her work which was a mixture of tailored and pleated items, many of them Melbourne-black, but others in electrifying colours.”
Five years later Pinto closed all of her boutiques, making Miyake harder for Melbourne’s creative class to find – at least until the advent of online shopping.
Now, two decades later, the soft shapes and amorphous hemlines are available from the online store Shifting Worlds (formerly on Elizabeth Street). Maya Webb, the store’s owner, attests to the longevity of the clothes – some of her clients of her still have Miyake pieces they bought from Pinto in the 1990s. “Miyake designs seem to be held on to in a way that other brands aren’t,” she says.
A Melbourne fashion festival attendee wears an outfit by local label Gorman in a style reminiscent of Issey Miyake’s designs. Photograph: Naomi Rahim/WireImage
She believes Melburnians love Miyake because “it fits so well into a ‘casual luxury’ category” that suits a city defined by its culture, not its beaches.
Pinto describes Miyake’s work as “a joyful, sculptural ‘dance’ of fabric to partner the human form”. Fashion that sits in the nexus between construction and art has had a lasting impact on local designers. From the ruching and necklines of Permanent Vacation to the draping and form of Alpha60, Miyake’s influence is evident.
Alpha60’s creative director, Georgie Cleary, says: “He managed to combine art, fashion and innovation so seamlessly in his designs, and this is something we continually strive for.”
In the interview, Brown says she has been “inappropriately sexualized” and “trolled” for years.
Before she deleted Twitter and TikTok, she was bombarded with hateful messages, threats, and NSFW remarks from adult men, and had to go to therapy to handle the harassment.
Now, the only way the actor communicates with her fans is via blog posts on her beauty brand, Florence by Mills’ website, because “nobody can comment.”
2. Her “unhealthy” relationship with Hunter Ecimovic.
In 2020, Brown was in a relationship with TikTok star Hunter Ecimovic, before cutting ties with him in January 2021.
Months later, in July, Ecimovic went live on social media claiming the two were allegedly in a sexual relationship when Brown was a minor.
“No one on the set [of Stranger Things] knew I was going through this,” she told Allure.
“So it was kind of nice to be able to just deal with that myself and no one else knew. Then it was harder when the whole world knew.”
He also claimed to have “groomed” and manipulated Brown, which his team denied.
In the interview, Brown called the relationship a “blip” in her life.
“It was a year of healing. When you get publicly humiliated this way, I felt so out of control and powerless,” she said.
“Walking away and knowing that I’m worth everything and this person didn’t take anything from me, it felt very empowering. It felt like my life had finally turned a page and that I actually had ended a chapter that felt so f* **ing long.”
Brown has since been in a relationship with Jake Bongiovi, the son of Jon Bon Jovi.
Yo rang my old friend Graham Caveney in England. When I answered the phone, I asked how he was.
Automatically. Unthinkingly.
“I’m all right, mate,” he replied.
reflexively. Courteously.
“You’re not though, are you?” I said.
“No,” I have admitted. “I’m not.”
I had just received his message that doctors had given him six months to live. At most. With no warning. He was 57 years old, one year younger than me. He offered to share the “funny” version of the story of his impending death, which he was developing as a kind of low-key spoken-word performance, with ironic twists, comedic turns and feint-and-jab punchlines.
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I don’t know when he hoped to present it, or where he felt it would fit into his repertoire.
But that’s what writers do with our lives. We turn everything into a story.
Graham’s most recent book, On Agoraphobia, had been released a fortnight previously, in April. He had a three-page extract published in the UK Guardian and the newspaper’s book reviewer – or, at least, the sub-editor who wrote the headline – had called it “a brilliant memoir”.
Sober now for nearly 13 years, Graham had been working on his fitness, jogging around a lake in a park, clutching a kettlebell in each hand. His new workout was an instant success: weight loss was sudden and spectacular. It was as if Graham had finally cracked the exercise riddle.
But it turned out that he had terminal cancer: it had started, undetected, in his oesophagus and spread, incurably, to his liver.
The article’s author Mark Dapin, left, and Graham Caveney met almost 40 years ago.Credit:Courtesy of Mark Dapin
He opened a letter from his doctors officially confirming that he had a 43-centimetre tumor growing inside his body, murdering him. He knew it was a mistake: the tumor was only 4.3 centimetres. Surely, he thought, if the medical staff could mix up their numbers, they might also confuse their words from him. Perhaps when they describe the tumor as “malign”, they had meant to type “benign”.
Graham laughed – with the same gravelly, scraping cackle that has made him sound as though he were about to topple into a grave cut ever since I first met him at university in 1983.
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And he had been close to death in the past. Abused as a child by Father Kevin O’Neill, the head teacher at his school in Blackburn, Lancashire, Graham was living in a crack house, his teeth bashed out by gangsters, when he finally fought his way out of his suicidal stupor and into a life without drugs and alcohol.
I wrote a feature about Graham’s re-emergence as a writer for this magazine in 2017. On the phone, Graham “joked” that I was probably already planning to write a follow-up piece about his death: “Remember that abused kid, well …”
It had crossed my mind, yeah.
“Do it,” he said.
Graham said doctors had told him that he might live 14 months if he opted for chemotherapy, but he had decided against it, as he would have to waste what little time he had left in the world with his head in a bucket, vomiting.
I pointed out that he had already spent half his life that way.
I have laughed dutifully. He had given me the opening and I had taken it. Mechanically. Unimaginatively. We were the straight man and his comic foil of him, performing for an audience of none.
I promised that I would come back to England as soon as I could. I needed to speak with him in person (for the story, if nothing else). Graham assured me that he did not want his friends to feel that he was not interested in their lives, or that it was somehow trivial for them to talk about themselves. I told him not to worry about that with me, mate. Boom boom.
He planned to marry his partner, Emma, before his funeral, which sounded like the right order in which to do these things. There was a COVID-19-driven backlog of couples waiting to be wed but, apparently, you jump to the front of the queue if the celebrant knows that you might be dead by Christmas. It’s also comparatively easy to attract and retain the attention of your GP, even with Britain’s National Health Service in permanent crisis.
There are all sorts of little-known advantages to dying.
I flew from Sydney to London, looped west to see my mum in Bristol, then caught a train through the body of England and met Graham somewhere close to its belly, in the town of Beeston, near Nottingham.
It seemed a down-to-earth sort of place. I passed a lounge bar and restaurant called Lounge Bar and Restaurant. When I took a picture of the sign, the owner stepped out, as if to fight me.
Later in the day, he found a boarded-up corner shop called The Corner Shop.
I had been worried that I might not recognize Graham but he arrived dressed up as me – or, at least, me 40 years ago – in jeans and boots, a Fred Perry cardigan and a pork-pie hat.
I felt uneasy with jetlag, but quietly overjoyed to see him. He was slimmer than ever, but he seemed taller, too. Graham was unbowed.
We had arranged to have lunch in a town-centre bar – which, disappointingly, was not called Town Center Bar – but it was closed, so Graham took me home to his house in a terrace magically tucked away from the unbustle of nearby streets. The downstairs walls seemed made of books.
Dapin, left, and Caveney in 2017.Credit:Courtesy of Mark Dapin
Graham told me that he had decided to go for chemotherapy after all. He had misunderstood his choices of him, believing he could trade a shorter lifespan for greater dignity, but it turned out that he was going to spend his last days in the bucket either way. I refused to allow myself to imagine how that might feel.
He was going to begin the treatment two days after his wedding. The oncologist had asked to see him on his wedding day.
When we were younger, I had not known that Graham had been preyed upon by the priest, or that he suffered from agoraphobia. In his new book, he writes: “To be sexually abused is to be invaded, colonized. It calls into question one of the key tenets of our selfhood: Who does my body belong to? The answer is far from clear. Strategies of survival include: collaboration, insurgency, separatism, insurrection. We may combine these strategies, or alternate them. We may go on dirty protest or hunger strike, or carve graffiti on our arms and the backs of our legs.
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“Or we may retreat, find the unexpectedness of society simply too much to risk.”
But Graham is reluctant to ascribe his agoraphobia directly to the churchman’s betrayal.
What does “agoraphobia” even mean? A psychiatrist once asked Graham how he might teach a course on becoming agoraphobic. Graham wrote:
Avoid spaces that make you feel empty.
Avoid empty spaces.
Start to suspect there are two things only: indoors or outdoors.
Find it surprising there are people in the world who are not agoraphobic.
Think of the window pane as a movie screen.
Wonder if blind people can be agoraphobic.
Picture these words written on a flip chart.
Flip them.
And watch them disappear.
It is brittle, beautiful poetry. But so what?
I ignored Graham’s psychic pain. Because I get toey sitting in a house, and I like to be outside, with people. So, in the course of the next 24 hours, I cajoled Graham into taking me on a walk through the town and a stroll around the lake (the lake!). We had dinner in The Victoria pub and breakfast at Caffè Nero.
We talked and laughed continually. We alternated as comedians, by tacit agreement.
Fleetingly, I felt as though I were in a writers’ room, working up material for a sitcom about a dying artist and his idiot mate. But only for one self-aware, self-hating moment.
We spoke a little about people we used to know and things we used to do, but Graham did not want to linger in the past. He was proud and happy to be sober and in love with Emma, and to have written his most recent books by him.
Because the topic we talked about the most was writing. We bitched about publishers, agents, royalties, contracts, book tours and reviewers. It was fluid and cathartic and important, because we have both grown up and it’s with wonder that I have come to understand that we are both authors – proper writers – and that was all we ever wanted to be.
Once, when I mistakenly thought I was dying (in fact, I had been rushed to hospital with, um, indigestion), it wasn’t my life that passed before my eyes, but my children and my novels.
Graham writes like an angel – okay, that might be an insensitive choice of word – and the success of On Agoraphobia you have suggested that other people understand and appreciate that.
All we writers have to offer the world is our words and our love.
The world has accepted Graham’s, and I think that makes it easier for him to die.
To read more from good weekend magazine, visit our page atThe Sydney Morning Herald,The Age andBrisbaneTimes.
If you can believe the biggest ever series of The Block you have gotten even bigger. The Official Block Podcast is now the ultimate companion show to Australia’s favorite renewing program.
Hosted by Shelley Craft and produced by 9Podcasts, The Official Block Podcast is releasing episodes every Monday.
Stream The Block Podcast on 9Now.
Each Monday after The Block‘s Room Reveals, Shelley will be joined by judges, including Shaynna Blaze, Neale Whitaker and Darren Palmer, The Block contestants, and even Scotty Cam to answer viewer questions, and lift the veil on decisions made and verdicts rendered.
It’s the perfect opportunity for Blockheads to interact directly with stars of the show, to learn why creative choices were made whilst hearing detailed explanations and advice on why some designs were huge hits and others were major flops.
The Official Block Podcast is available for listening across all leading podcast platforms and on 9Now, in addition to the leading podcast platforms, making it easier for Blockheads to discover more exclusives from the show.
Co-Host of The Block and host of The Block Podcast Shelley Craft. (Nine)
“The new block podcast provides much more behind-the-scenes [of the show],” Shelley told 9Entertainment.
“The Block does so well across all its platforms, but this will just be the next level. And now that I’m some kind of podcasting guru, I’m looking forward to using it in my real job too,” she explained.
In addition to hosting The Official Block PodcastShelley also hosts a new podcast called The Aging Project.
The Aging Project is a podcast featuring candid, no-holds-barred interviews with twelve of the world’s leading and most inspiring minds in the field of aging well.
The first episode of The Block Podcast features an in-depth discussion on this week’s block walkout, which saw Joel and Elle leave the show.
long-time block host Scott Cam joins Shelley to discuss the walkout and how the show’s producers and crew had to quickly adjust to such a dramatic change in their plans.
Scott & Shelley as seen on The Block Tree Change. (Nine)
Listen to The Block podcast on your favorite Podcast app or stream (for free) on 9Now.
In Pictures
Tom and Sarah-Jane’s House Decider Challenge Bedroom
Judges wowed by couple’s color palette and style.
ViewGallery
The Block airs Sunday at 7.00pm and Monday to Wednesday at 7.30pm on Nine. Catch up on all thelatest episodes on 9Now.
