You’d be forgiven for thinking Melbourne-based stripper Will Parfitt was Hollywood heart-throb Channing Tatum.
Parfitt, originally from London, has gained millions of followers on social media through his uncanny resemblance to the magic mike star – and he’s made a fortune along the way.
With nearly six million followers on TikTok, the British-born performer is now Australia’s most-requested male entertainer, revealing to news.com.au podcast I’ve Got News For You he makes between $700 and $1000 per show, “depending on how long they want me to stay”.
The Magic Men co-owner has been performing since 2015, and shared with host Andrew Bucklow the sex question “every girl” asks male strippers – whether they get “excited” during a show.
“We always get this question. But it’s so different – when you’ve got the adrenaline and you’re nervous, and you’re obviously performing in front of sometimes up to 1000, 2000 girls in the crowd, it’s the last thing you’re thinking of,” Parfitt said.
“Even though you’re doing sexual movements or you’re grinding on the girls, you’re not in that mind frame. You don’t think of it as sexual. Because it’s like, I guess, dancing on stage – so you’re just thinking about your choreography.
“But every time we get asked this question. The girls are like, ‘How do you not get turned onstage?’ But every guy I’ve ever performed with says the same thing – we just don’t think of it.”
Asked whether women get handsy, Parfitt admitted that “they sometimes do.”
“Because I always go on at the end of the show, I always get the drunk girls, and they’re always the hardest to deal with,” he explained.
“We do pick girls out of the crowd, so you’re trying to communicate with them while you’re on stage, or try and give them little instructions so they know what’s going on, but they do get a bit handsy. I’ve definitely left the stage with a few scratch marks.
“But some girls don’t care. If they’re wearing dresses – sometimes I try and pick a girl who’s wearing pants because I’m like, if you’re wearing a dress, there’s a high chance it could go above your head when we’re doing like different moves and stuff – but they just don’t care.
“They’re like, ‘I don’t care, I just want to go on stage’. They’re on stage in their underwear – they’re stripping more than us on that stage sometimes.”
As for whether women request him to perform “other services” after a show, Parfitt said it wasn’t out of the ordinary.
“They do sometimes. I think with the industry we’re in, obviously, they put us in the same category as doing more than just performing,” he said.
“I’ve definitely had a few offers for that, especially at private events that you go to. But no, I’m just a performer.”
You can listen to the full chat with Will Parfitt here.
Heavy spenders Chelsea have already been busy during the transfer window, and are almost certainly not finished despite spending €186.59m ($A270m) so far.
According to reports, the club are reportedly prepared to sign both Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang and Frenkie de Jong from Barcelona, as well as Wesley Fofana from Leicester.
Chelsea have already signed Raheem Sterling, Kalidou Koulibaly, Gabriel Slonina, Carney Chukwuemeka and Marc Cucurella in their squad overhaul.
World-class striker Aubameyang, a former club captain of London rivals Arsenal, would represent the latest in a long line of superstar strikers to have joined Stamford Bridge – although many have struggled to make their mark.
Indeed, Chelsea’s number nine jersey has been worn by so many flops in recent years that coach Thomas Tuchel revealed that no-one will wear the number this season.
“It’s cursed, it’s cursed, people tell me it’s cursed … nobody wants to touch the No 9,” he said.
But it’s not just the number nine jersey that has been a curse at Chelsea. Dating back to the end of the last century, many of Chelsea’s big-name attacking signings have failed to make their mark.
Here are some of the great Blues flops of the modern era.
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CHRIS SUTTON
Transfer fee: £10m ($17m AUD) from Blackburn in 1999
Playing record: One goal in 28 Premier League games
Chelsea reached deep into their pockets to lure Sutton to Stamford Bridge from relegation stricken Blackburn, for what was then a club record fee.
The striker had signed from the Rovers, where he starred alongside Premier League icon Alan Shearer, after they placed second-last in the 1998-99 season.
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But the former England international had a forgettable debut campaign with the Blues, scoring just one goal from his 28 Premier League appearances.
Sutton’s sole contribution on the scoresheet came in a 5-0 thrashing of English giants Manchester United, which was a highlight in an otherwise quiet tenure in London.
His season went from bad to worse when he failed to make Chelsea’s bench for the 2000 FA Cup Final against Aston Villa, which the Blues won 1-0.
Sutton was a one season flop at Chelsea, though, after securing a transfer to Scottish giants Celtic.
ADRIAN MUTU
Transfer fees: €22.5m ($32m AUD) from Parma in 2003
Playing record: 10 goals from 38 games
Mutu began his Chelsea career in fine form, scoring four goals from his first three appearances for the giants of English football.
Playing in front of new fans for the first time, the Romanian scored the winning goal on his club debut against Leicester City.
But drama ensued as his relationship with Jose Mourinho reportedly reached its boiling point, with Mutu facing backlash from his manager after he claimed to be injured.
Chelsea later fired the striker after he tested positive for cocaine use in 2004, and was suspended for seven months.
Although he was not at the London club anymore, Mutu failed another anti-doping test in January of 2010, as reported by the Guardian.
Mutu, who also wore the number seven jersey at Chelsea, was handed a nine-month ban for that incident.
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ANDRIY SHEVCHENKO
Transfer fees: €43.9m ($63m AUD) from Milan in 2006
Playing record: Nine goals from 48 Premier League games
Chelsea splashed the cash once again to sign Ukrainian Andriy Shevchenko, who became the biggest signing in English football at the time.
Shevchenko, who was 30-year-old when he moved to London from Milan, was handed the number seven jersey under decorated coach Jose Mourinho.
But he failed to live up to the hype, scoring just 14 goals from 51 games during his first season with the famous London club.
Andriy Shevchenko had a forgettable spell with Chelsea.Source: AP
Shevchenko was loaned out to AC Milan, the club he’d signed from, during the 2008/09 season after failing to hit his stride at Stamford Bridge.
As reported by The Guardian, manager Carlo Ancelotti believed that Shevchenko was the fourth best striker at the club, just three years after he secured his record transfer.
Shevchenko was left out of Chelsea’s squad for the 2009/10 Champions League, and later returned to Dynamo Kyiv.
FERNANDO TORRES
Transfer fees: £50m ($85m AUD) from Liverpool in 2011
Playing record: 20 goals in 110 Premier League games for Chelsea
Fernando Torres rose to footballing stardom during a successful stint at Liverpool, where he truly embodied the phrase ‘human highlight reel’.
Torres had already made his name in Spain, after being handed the Atletico Madrid captaincy at just 19 years of age.
The Spaniard left Madrid for Liverpool, although he’d return to the club at the back end of his career, and quickly proved himself to be one of the most exciting players in England.
Fernando Torres struggled to find some form after completing his move to Stamford Bridge. (Photo by Shaun Botterill/Getty Images)Source: Getty Images
But drama struck early in 2011, as Torres completed a sensational transfer to Premier League rivals Chelsea.
The Blues again broke the British transfer record for a reported fee of £50 million, as the striker completed a mid-season move sent shockwaves throughout the league.
Hollywood couldn’t have scripted it better, though, as Torres made his club debut for Chelsea after Liverpool.
The Blues lost that 1-0 and maybe it was a sign of things to come, as Torres went on to score just 20 goals in 110 Premier League appearances for Chelsea.
But while he failed to fire, these big money moves are all about making an impact when it counts, and Torres did that in the biggest competition that world football has to offer.
While he was far from an overwhelming success at Stamford Bridge, Torres did score a game sealing goal against Barcelona in a Champions League semi-final.
Chelsea went on to win their first ever Champions League crown in the 2011-12 campaign, beating German powerhouse Bayern Munich 4-3 on penalties.
MOHAMED SALAH
Transfer fee: £11m ($18m AUD) from Basel in 2014
Playing record: Two goals from 13 games
Mohamed Salah has cemented his legacy as a Premier League legend after a stellar career with Liverpool, but his career in England wasn’t always so successful.
The ‘Egyptian King’ made just 19 appearances for Chelsea, before he was loaned out to Fiorentina just 13-months after moving to London.
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Salah’s two best Premier League games in Blue came in a 6-0 win over rivals Arsenal, where he scored, as well as a promising showing against Stoke.
Salah was later loaned out to Roma, before securing a permanent move to the Italian capital soon after.
But the scintillating winger really took his career to the next Liverpool after he secured a well-known transfer to Liverpool.
Not only has Salah tasted success in both the Champions League and Premier League with the Merseyside club, but he’s widely considered to be one of the best footballers on the planet.
In fact he’s become so popular, the Economist revealed that more than one million Egyptians spoiled their ballots by trying to vote for Salah during the presidential election in 2018.
With many noteworthy individual accolades on the football field to speak of as well, Salah is certainly another gem that Chelsea failed to cherish when they had the chance.
ALVARO MORATA
Transfer fees: Around £60m ($103m AUD) from Real Madrid in 2017
Playing record: 24 goals from about 72 games
After impressive spells with European giants Juventus and Real Madrid, Morata was brought into the club as a replacement for Diego Costa.
Costa, who won two Premier League titles and scored 59 goals for Chelsea, returned to Atletico Madrid after being told he was free to look elsewhere.
Morata was another striker who had the weight of the world on his shoulders when he moved to Stamford Bridge, due to the hype surrounding his arrival.
But the Spaniard failed to make an impression on the scoresheet, scoring just 15 goals in his 48 games.
After initially signing for the club on a five year deal, Morata was eventually loaned out to Atletico Madrid on an 18-month deal.
Atletico signed him on a permanent deal later, although he was loaned out to Juventus soon after in September, 2020.
TIMO WERNER
Transfer fees: €60m ($87m AUD) from RB Leipzig in 2020
playing record 23 goals in 89 appearances
Werner was one of the hottest properties on the football transfer market as European giants came looking to sign the star striker after an incredible spell at RB Leipzig.
During his four years at the German club, Werner scored 90 goals and had 40 assists from 156 competitive games.
Liverpool were also believed to be in the hunt for his signature, before he completed an expensive move to Chelsea on a five-year deal.
But the German quickly fell out of favor at Chelsea, having scored just 23 goals in 89 appearances.
With Chelsea reportedly looking to sign some strikers in the ongoing transfer window, the 26-year-old left the club and returned to RB Leipzig.
ROMELU LUKAKU
Transfer fees: £97.5m ($167m AUD) from Inter Milan in 2021
Playing record: 15 goals in all competitions from 44 games
Belgian Romelu Lukaku may have had a fairly expensive price tag to his name last year, but that didn’t stop Chelsea from making another mind-blowing investment in their future.
Once again, the Blues broke their transfer record to sign the striker from Italian giants Inter Milan.
Romelu Lukaku was a marquee signing for Chelsea, but he failed to make his mark on the scoresheet. (Photo by Clive Rose/Getty Images)Source: Getty Images
With their Champions League glory still fresh in the minds of football fans, Chelsea managed to lure the powerful striker back to Stamford Bridge on an incredible transfer.
Despite their European success, Chelsea had come fourth in the Premier League the year before, but this signing was widely considered to be a difference maker.
Many believed that Lukaku could fire for the Blues after a previous stint at the club earlier in his career, before more well-known and successful stints with the likes of Everton and Manchester United.
But it was a disastrous return to the Premier League for Lukaku, who scored just eight goals before completing a loan move back to Inter Milan – and leaving the number nine jersey vacant.
When the current history of Hollywood gets written, April 19, 2022 will go down as the day that everything changed.
It should have been a routine earnings call during which Netflix co-CEO Reed Hastings took tech and business reporters through the company’s latest figures. Instead, Hastings revealed that the company had lost hundreds of thousands of subscribers for the first drop in numbers in 10 years.
The revelations immediately set off something of an earthquake from Wall Street to Los Angeles, with $75 billion in value being wiped off the company’s value in 24 hours.
Why this matters are the consequences this precipitous, stunning reversal in fortune could have for two people about 450km south of Netflix’s headquarters, in the wealthy enclave of Montecito.
In the course of that one earnings one call, not only did the streaming giant’s once-unassailable hold on the entertainment industry come unstuck, but so too did the supposedly cashed-up future of Harry and Meghan, Duke and Duchess of Sussex, start to look much less certain.
Monday marks 712 days since the world learned on September 2 2020 that the newly self-emancipated Sussexes had signed a reported $US140 million ($A197 million) deal with Netflix via no lesser news outlet than the New York Times with the story trumpeting the duo’s “new Hollywood careers”.
But today, those “new Hollywood careers” have yet to actually take off while once mighty Netflix has lost more than $US200 billion ($A280 billion) in value (yes, billion with a ‘b’) this year.
Nearly two years on from all the self-contributory ballyhoo of September 2, 2020, the landscape for both the titled duo and the streamer has significantly shifted beneath them all.
Will – or even can – the Sussex/Netflix marriage survive?
Not only have the fortunes of Netflix lurched wildly since 2020 but so have Harry and Meghan’s.
At the time the deal was announced, it seemed like the most obvious and logical pairing: Two of the most famous people in the world would worthily churn out documentaries or some such; inreturn; Netflix got to tout the fact that they had a real life Duke and Duchess on their books. Harry and Meghan would get squillions; the company would reap the rewards of the PR coup of the decade.
However, the royal duo are not exactly the sizzlingly-hot property they were back then now are they?
More than 30 months have passed since Harry and Meghan absconded from a life of stifling royal duty for the greener pastures of California and that lucrative embrace of corporate America.
In that time they have managed to ink a series of headline-making deals, including also with Spotify, the coaching company BetterUp and with Ethic, a fintech asset manager, along with launching their charitable foundation and undertaking a seemingly never ending parade of photo opportunities. .
On paper it sounds like it’s been a whirligig of achievement and just the sort of industrious self-starting that America was founded on. Except … what have they actually achieved?
Yes, they have made a series of donations to causes ranging from the World Food Kitchen to helping fix a women’s shelter’s roof after a storm which reflects their generosity and hunger to help others. Kudos. But writing a check here and there is hardly the sort of work that will ever see them make the long list for the Nobel Peace Prize.
Sadly, for two people who seem to truly care, there is not one issue, not one cause they have really moved the needle on since they embarked on this new life of theirs.
More importantly for their Netflix and Spotify paymasters, they have failed to genuinely set themselves up as leading voices of the day. They might do their darnedest to sell themselves as inspiring leaders but the proof is in the flaccid pudding that was the lackluster turnout to Harry’s recent UN speech from him.
The international community was hardly turning up in droves to hear him speak while Washington has largely ignored them.
Meghan’s cold-calling of senators about paid parental leave last year went down about as well as a gluten and dairy-free scone at a Buckingham Palace garden party and the Duchess has yet to emerge as any sort of powerplayer ahead of the midterm elections later this year.
In late June, the former actress took part in a conversation with feminist pioneer Gloria Steinem for fashion after the horrendous quashing of abortion protection, saying: “Well, Gloria, maybe it seems as though you and I will be taking a trip to DC together soon.”
Nearly two months on, the Duchess has yet to turn up inside the Beltway.
The bottom line is this: Harry and Meghan have proven totally unsuccessful at making themselves matter in the corridors of power in Washington, New York, Silicon Valley or Los Angeles.
The magic dust of their royalty has largely dulled in the last two years and the novelty factor has worn off. So too has their deal-making momentum seemed to have waned with them not having announced any other venture since July 2021 last year when it was revealed Harry was busy working on a memoir.
Things might look different today if in the last 712 days the Sussexes had been churning out series after doco after one-off specials for Netflix, but as we all know, that is not the case. The company has only ever publicly announced two Sussex projects: Harry’s documentary about the sporting event for wounded armed services personnel Heart of Invictus (an amazing initiative he started years ago as a working member of the royal family) and an animated children’s series from Meghan called Pearl.
In early May it was announced that Netflix was axing the Duchess’ show as part of a much bigger cost-cutting move, with numerous high-profile projects canned as the streamer dramatically tighten their belts.
Then later the same month came news that the company was about to get, as Page Six put it, their “pound of flesh” from the duo with the revelation that Harry and Meghan were already filming something called an “at home” docu series which has a hint of the ignominious about it. (More recent reporting has suggested that Netflix wants it to air before the year is out.)
Potentially hundreds of millions of dollars are riding on this docu series for the self-supporting, private jet-flying, polo-loving Sussexes.
If it turns out that the Duke and Duchess are TV gold, if they are about to demonstrate that they are binge-worthy stars who can pull in streaming viewers globally, then their US careers are set. Get another polo pony! Hell, buy seven.
But, if they fail to live up to the hype and the rhetoric? The huge sums being touted and all those lovely millions supposedly coming their way could dry up faster than a Californian lake.
(And it’s not as if their docuseries is likely to feature much royal access given that Harry and Meghan were embarrassingly sidelined by The Firm when they were in London for the Platinum Jubilee.)
Netflix is clearly a very patient company when it comes to their superstar recruits. Take Barack and Michelle Obama who signed to Netflix and Spotify after they left the White House.
However, this week, Harry and Meghan will break the Obamas’ track record of the 716 days which elapsed between their Netflix deal being announced and their first marquee project starring one of them, coming, being released. (And in the interim they had released two children’s shows and produced two documentaries, one of which won an Oscar.)
Harry and Meghan might have titles and the Buckingham Palace Wi-Fi password but that is not enough of a distinction for big companies to merrily tip millions into their bank accounts for the chance to work with them. They have to actually do something to provide themselves.
They can’t just hope they can coast along on the whiff of a mothballed HRH here forever more.
Since that earnings call in April, Netflix has laid off hundreds of staff and made the drastic decision to finally introduce advertising to the platform. Can the company still afford to carry big name stars who don’t deliver on their books?
Just how much patience and faith will this newly humbled Netflix have for their yet-to-perform big-name hires?
To some degree, the same goes for Spotify too here.
In April, Meghan’s first outing for the audio giant called Archetypes was announced, promising a “groundbreaking” series would launch during the northern summer. With only weeks to go before autumn begins, again, the clock is ticking.
Daniela Elser is a royal expert and a writer with more than 15 years’ experience working with a number of Australia’s leading media titles.
Harry Kane snatched a 96th minute equalizer to salvage a 2-2 draw for Tottenham from a feisty London derby against Chelsea.
Both managers Antonio Conte and Thomas Tuchel were sent-off after the full-time whistle for their second physical altercation of the match.
Chelsea looked set to get a new era at Stamford Bridge off to the best possible start as they twice led through Kalidou Koulibaly and Reece James.
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Ben Davies (R) celebrates with Ivan Perisic (C) after Harry Kane scores their late equaliser. (Photo by Glyn KIRK / AFP)Source: AFP
Tottenham were well off the level required if they are to live up to hopes of challenging Manchester City and Liverpool for the title, but showed the newfound character instilled by Conte to fight back for a point.
The Italian and Tuchel were both booked in the aftermath of Pierre-Emile Hojbjerg’s first equaliser.
Tempers then flared again during a handshake after Kane hesitated in with virtually the last action of the game.
“It is the Premier League and why we love it. It is emotional coaches on the sidelines,” said Tuchel.
“I think it (the red card) was not necessary. But a lot of things were not necessary today so it is another poor decision from the referee.
“It’s emotional. You like it. We don’t need comments now. It was heated up and heated up.
“I thought when you shake hands you look into each other’s eyes. Antonio (Conte) had other ideas.”
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Antonio Conte (R) and Thomas Tuchel (L) shake hands then clash. (Photo by Glyn KIRK / AFP)Source: AFPThe game finished 2-2. (Photo by Glyn KIRK / AFP)Source: AFP
Tottenham have still only won once at Stamford Bridge in 32 years in the league, but Conte will be delighted to escape with a share of the spoils against his former club.
“There is a difference between Chelsea and Tottenham but we are here to reduce this gap,” said the Italian. “Last season we lost three times, this time we drew so it’s a little step forward.”
New Chelsea chairman Todd Boehly was welcomed by a huge banner from the Chelsea support and saw an early return on the near £170 million ($206 million) investment in the transfer market since he sanctioned a £2.5 billion takeover to buy the club from Roman Abramovich .
Despite the drastic changes in the boardroom, on the field it was like the old times under Abramovich as Chelsea outthought, outplayed and outmuscled Spurs for the first 45 minutes.
Two of their new signings combined for the opening goal as it was from Marc Cucurella’s corner that Koulibaly found space to volley home.
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Conte again resisted the temptation to start any of his six new signings, but it was not until the introduction of Richarlison just before the hour mark and a switch of formation that Tottenham began to threaten.
Kane had a glorious chance to level when he uncharacteristically dragged wide with only Edouard Mendy to beat.
Spurs did level 22 minutes from time in controversial fashion to light the spark between the two managers.
Kai Havertz looked to be clearly fouled by Rodrigo Bentancur before Tottenham broke forward and the ball eventually fell to Hojbjerg to fire low and hard past Mendy.
Tuchel reacted furiously to the decision and Conte’s overzealous celebration. The German fought fire with fire as he sprinted down the touchline to celebrate when James thrashed home Raheem Sterling’s pass to restore Chelsea’s lead 13 minutes from time.
However, Kane had the final say as he flicked in Ivan Perisic’s corner deep into added time.
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Earlier, Nottingham Forest celebrated their first home game in the Premier League for 23 years by beating West Ham 1-0.
The two-time European champions have made 14 new signings in a bid to maintain their top-flight status and two of those making their home debuts were the heroes as Taiwo Awoniyi scored the only goal and Dean Henderson saved Declan Rice’s penalty.
Forest had fortune on their side as the Hammers also had a first-half goal controversially ruled out and hit the underside of the crossbar twice after the break through Pablo Fornals and Said Benrahma.
But that mattered little to a capacity 30,000 crowd at the City Ground, who roared the home side over the line.
West Ham have now lost both their opening two games of the season, but in stark contrast to a 2-0 defeat to Manchester City last weekend, they should have taken at least a point back to London.
Taiwo Awoniyi of Notts Forest celebrates scoring the first goal (Photo by Michael Regan/Getty Images)Source: Getty Images
Benrahma’s cool finish from Rice’s pass was ruled out after a VAR review for a foul by Michail Antonio as he blocked off Moussa Niakhate.
On top of nearly £100 million in transfer fees, Forest have splashed out a reported £200,000-a-week to secure Jesse Lingard on a one-year deal.
Lingard had been long linked with a return to West Ham after a successful loan spell in the 2020/21 season.
And he played a part in the winner as his shot was blocked by Ben Johnson but rebounded in off Awoniyi’s knee.
Bar a Brennan Johnson goal that was ruled out by VAR for offside, it was the visitors who had all the best chances after the break.
Fornals smashed an effort of the bar seconds into the second period before Benrahma did likewise from a nearly inch-perfect free-kick.
Rice had the best chance of all from the spot after Scott McKenna handled Tomas Soucek’s effort.
However, Henderson made himself an instant hero by diving low to his right to save the penalty.
More desperate defending was needed by Neco Williams to clear Kurt Zouma’s header off the line late on, but Forest held out for a famous win
Manchester United legend Gary Neville says his former team hit “a new low” during its embarrassing loss to Brentford before unleashing on the club’s owners for a hands-off approach that has created a “toxic” environment.
Erik ten Hag’s bad start as Manchester United manager descended into an embarrassment on Sunday morning (AEST) as a 4-0 thrashing by Brentford left the Red Devils bottom of the Premier League for the first time in 30 years.
United have now conceded four goals or more seven times in the Premier League since the start of last season.
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Brentford, who only ended a 74-year absence from English football’s top flight with promotion to the Premier League in August 2021, punished a series of errors to score four times in the first 35 minutes to spark joyous scenes at their west London ground.
United fell behind in woeful fashion when goalkeeper David de Gea somehow let a Josh Dasilva shot slip through his grasp before Mathias Jensen struck as the visitors failed to play out from the back. Ben Mee then exposed United’s frailty from set-pieces for his first Brentford goal and Bryan Mbuemo rounded off a stunning counter-attack 10 minutes before half-time.
David De Gea of Manchester United acknowledges fans following the defeat in the Premier League. Picture: Catherine IvilleSource: Getty Images
De Gea took the extraordinary step of voluntarily fronting the media post-game to take responsibility for the loss, telling Sky Sports: “I think I cost three points to my team today to be honest. It was a poor performance from myself… It was a horrible day.”
But ten Hag said he was the “main responsibility” for a humiliating loss.
The jubilant home support taunted Ten Hag with chants of “you’re getting sacked in the morning”. But the Dutch coach has inherited a rabble rather than being the root cause as United lost a seventh consecutive away league match for the first time since 1936.
“We all have seen the game. I think Brentford were more hungry and we conceded goals to individual mistakes,” said Ten Hag.
“You can have a good plan but that puts the plan in the bin.”
Liverpool legend Jamie Redknapp pointed to stats from the game that showed Brentford covered 109.4km during the match compared to Manchester United’s 95.6km
“That for me is just not good enough by any stretch of the imagination,” Redknapp told Sky Sports.
Manchester United’s striker Cristiano Ronaldo reacts as Brentford players celebrate. Picture: Ian KingtonSource: AFP
“You’re not always good, you can’t always play great – but you can always run around. That is so damning for that Manchester United team – I don’t care who the manager is, I don’t care who the owners are, that has got nothing to do with it. That is running for the shirt.
“That is a disgrace from their point of view. If you’re the manager and you go into the dressing room and you show them that, I would be so embarrassed a footballer
“From the players that started and finished that game, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a more abject performance from a club that I would regard as one of the biggest in the world to play like that.
“I just don’t think they showed they cared.”
Neville said Manchester United players had now come under three different managers “they don’t work as hard as the teams they’re playing against”.
“How long have we been saying in football ‘hard work will beat talent when talent doesn’t work hard’? That Manchester United team don’t run hard enough, they don’t run fast enough,” Neville told Sky Sports.
Manchester United’s manager Erik ten Hag. Picture: Ian KingtonSource: AFP
“They are absolutely drained of all confidence, they’re struggling badly – and they have been now for 12 months.
“Today was a new low. It seems that continually Manchester United can surpass their previous lows – and when is the lowest low going to come? Because the reality of it is this is really, really bad.”
United were last crowned champions of England in the 2012/13 season in manager Alex Ferguson’s final campaign before retirement.
The arrival of £57 million ($69 million) centre-back Lisandro Martinez from Ajax has done little to shore up United’s leaky defense and questions will be asked of why Ten Hag has left Raphael Varane on the bench in favor of the Argentine and the out -of-sorts Harry Maguire.
While Ten Hag was keen to bolster his squad, he was adamant the team he sat out at Brentford was far better than this result indicated.
“It is clear we need players but I don’t want to think about that at this moment,” he said.
“The good players we had should have been better. I hoped for a better start, but still I have to believe because I have seen good things but the two games from now are disappointing.”
Former England full-back Neville – a longstanding critic of the Glazer family, the club’s US-based owners – slammed the hierarchy at Old Trafford for failing to give Ten Hag adequate support.
United fans are fuming. Picture: Catherine IvilleSource: Getty Images
“Manchester United have known for eight to 10 months they needed to rebuild the squad for the summer,” said Neville, now to Sky pundit.
“To not get the players in early, the quality of the players, the number of players that Erik ten Hag needed to be able to start the season, is baffling and difficult to forgive.”
Neville said the only money spent by Manchester United on players was from cash generated or borrowed “through its incredible fan base and a great commercial operation”.
“There’s a family over there in America who are just literally letting their employees take all the hits for them – and that is unforgivable,” Neville said.
“Joel Glazer has got to get on a plane… get over to Manchester and he’s got to start to divert the issues away from the club and tell everybody what the hell this plan is with the football club. What is he doing?
“You can look at the players all you like, but there are that many big things that need to be put right first, they’ve got to show up and basically face the music. Now’s the time. You can’t keep hanging over in Tampa and thinking that nothing’s going to come back to you.
Manchester United’s defender Harry Maguire. Picture: Ian KingtonSource: AFP
“These owners since Sir Alex Ferguson have proven in 10 years they cannot manage a forward-thinking football club. It’s been overtaken in every single department and it’s painful and it’s woeful.
“At this moment in time, there has been a toxic culture and atmosphere created at the club over a 10-year period without its leader, Sir Alex Ferguson and David Gill, who were propping the club up whilst the family sat there in America glorifying the fact that they were part of it. We’re now seeing what has happened without Sir Alex Ferguson, without David Gill, without leadership. We’re now seeing what’s happening and it’s a mess.
“It cannot continue to go on.”
United host Liverpool, who beat their historic rivals 5-0 and 4-0 last season, in their next game on August 22.
It was inundated with negative reviews and hit headlines over its overpriced menu – yet Salt Bae’s controversial Nusr-Et restaurant in London has proved a hit with Instagrammers.
Diners have filled the social media platform with glamorous snaps showing them posing with the social media sensation or on the steakhouse’s standout stairs and showing the expensive dishes.
The Knightsbridge restaurant, part of a chain run by Turkish chef, Nusret Gökçe, who rose to viral fame back in 2017 for his unusual meat seasoning technique where he lets salt run down his elbow, made £7million of sales in its first four months.
This week, Nusret UK Limited, the company behind the steakhouse, filed financial reports to the UK’s Companies House revealing that it ‘performed higher than expected and made a profit of £2.3million in 2021.
Yet the impressive figure is hardly surprising when considering how expensive the menu at the steakhouse is.
Specials include a Golden Giant Tomahawk steak for £1,450, Golden Giant Striplion for £1,350 and Golden Kafes for £500 – while a simple burger and Red Bull will set you back £100 and £11 respectively.
It was inundated with negative reviews and hit headlines over its overpriced menu – yet Salt Bae’s controversial Nusr-Et restaurant in London has proved a hit with Instagrammers (pictured)
Diners (pictured right) have filled the social media platform with glamorous snaps showing them posing with the social media sensation or on the steakhouse’s standout stairs and showing the expensive dishes
The Knightsbridge restaurant, part of a chain run by Turkish chef, Nusret Gökçe, who rose to viral fame back in 2017 for his unusual meat seasoning technique where he lets salt run down his elbow, made £7million of sales in its first four months. Pictured, a diner at the steakhouse
This week, Nusret UK Limited, the company behind the steakhouse, filed financial reports to the UK’s Companies House revealing that it ‘performed higher than expected and made a profit of £2.3million in 2021. Pictured, a diner at the restaurant
David Beckham, Jason Statham and Naomi Campbell are among the famous faces to have eaten at Nusret’s restaurants – which include locations in New York, Dubai and Istanbul.
Meanwhile, Coleen Rooney and husband Wayne, Gemma Collins and Sam Thompson and Zara McDermott are some of the British celebs to have visited the London-based eatery after it opened in September 2021.
Yet just months after its highly-anticipated opening, it became one of the worst ranked restaurants on TripAdvisor after being slammed by unhappy customers online.
Diners were left less than impressed with the glitzy steakhouse, with a slew of bad reviews leaving it at number 20,491 out of 23,811 in the capital on TripAdvisor.
One person commented: ‘Do not be fooled by the glitz and glam and waste your money. Terrible food. Meat was not at all tasty. Ended up going for a £5 kebab after a £300 bill… this place is the biggest joke in London.’
Meanwhile another wrote: ‘Insult to humanity. Worst food, worst service. Paid over £1,800 for three of us. Poor quality, smelly meat, small portions. Rather spend £50 in the local restaurant, it will be better! Never again! Stay away, it’s a death trap!’
Yet the impressive figure is hardly surprising when considering how expensive the menu at the steakhouse is. Pictured, a customer at the restaurant
Specials include a Golden Giant Tomahawk steak for £1,450, Golden Giant Striplion for £1,350 and Golden Kafes for £500 – while a simple burger and coke will set you back £100 and £9 respectively. Pictured, a diner at the steakhouse
Just months after its highly-anticipated opening, it became one of the worst ranked restaurants on TripAdvisor after being slammed by unhappy customers online. Pictured, customers at the steakhouse
In March 2022, a sommelier who was fired from Salt Bae’s restaurant for ‘eating an avocado after 5.30pm’ branded the eatery a ‘toxic working environment’.
Guillermo Perez, 30, from Madrid, compared Nusr-Et to a ‘McDonald’s for rich people’ for charging guests extortionate prices – despite allegedly serving them ‘frozen chips with Heinz ketchup’.
Sommelier of eight years Mr Perez, who has lived in the UK since 2012, claimed the London eatery was ‘immoral’ in a scathing attack, adding that bottles of wine were being marked up by ‘incredible’ amounts.
‘Bottles worth £1,000 would be sold for up to £3,000, for example,’ Mr Perez told MailOnline. ‘Of course you can charge people whatever price you want, but it’s pretty immoral when the quality of the food and service does not match the price.
Cash to splash: Gemma Collins previously spoke of her shock at her £1,450 bill for a 24 carat Golden Tomahawk steak at Salt Bae’s London restaurant Nusr-et
Loved-up: Gemma enjoyed her meal at the Knightsbridge restaurant with her partner Rami Hawash
‘One day I saw a big bag of frozen chips and I thought “really? That’s what we are serving people?” And they had Heinz ketchup and mayonnaise, which you can get from the shop.’
Mr Perez continued: ‘I have worked in Mayfair and other good restaurants, but my experience there was very disappointing. I think people there want to show how much money they have, almost everybody paid in cash.’
Mr Perez said he was dragged into HR on January 20 after he was rated by a chef in the staff canteen – which is shared with a hotel – for eating his own avocado and rice.
David Beckham, Jason Statham and Naomi Campbell are among the famous faces to have eaten at Nusret’s restaurants – which include locations in New York, Dubai and Istanbul
Meanwhile, Coleen Rooney and husband Wayne, Gemma Collins and Sam Thompson and Zara McDermott are some of the British celebs to have visited the London-based eatery (pictured) after it opened in September 2021
Workers from Nusr-Et are not allowed to eat food from the canteen after 5.30pm, Mr Perez said.
‘I arrived with my own food at 5.35pm and took a plate and the chef started shouting at me telling me I can’t eat from the canteen,’ alleged Mr Perez, whose past work experience includes the upmarket Sushisamba.
‘I tried to explain that the avocado was mine and that I was just taking a plate and some cutlery and he accused me of being aggressive and called my general manager.’
Within 30 minutes, Mr Perez said he was told to report to HR, where he was chastised for ‘arguing with the chef’ and told not to return after that day. He said he was told he would not receive his week’s holiday pay or work a notice period.
MailOnline contacted Nusr-Et for comment.
Revealed: The eye-wateringly expensive menu in full
Somewhere in Aberdeenshire there is a sad Shetland pony. Named Lance Corporal Cruachan IV, the diminutive equine usually gets one moment in the spotlight a year, an all-too-brief chance to bask in the glow of global media interest during which he occasionally tries to nip the Queen or eat her bouquet.
As the mascot of the Royal Regiment of Scotland, Cruachan IV usually, at this time of year, enjoys his starring role in the Regiment’s ceremonial welcome of Her Majesty to her Balmoral estate, a traditional outing involving bagpipes and lots of big smiles and which marks the official start of the sovereign’s summer holiday.
But this year both Cruachan IV and the Queen have been kept confined to barracks, so to speak.
This week it was reported that for “reasons of comfort” the ceremonial welcome happened in private but this is just the latest sign that the sovereign’s advancing years and ongoing health woes are posing an increasingly blatant impediment on usual schedule.
News that Her Majesty would not be enjoying her yearly face-to-face with Cruachan IV just tops off what has been a bit of a rotten start to her holiday; a holiday that is already shaping up to be something of a dud thanks to the machinations of Downing Street and her wayward family.
It was only at the tail end of the Queen’s summer holidays last year, a scant 12 months ago or thereabouts, that Buckingham Palace was busy touting what a packed autumn schedule of dozens and dozens of events were planned. The message was clear: The Queen is fighting fit and ready to Queen with some seriously impressive vigor and vim! Trips to Northern Ireland, Wales and Scotland were planned as things geared up towards her big Jubilee year from her!
That ambitious plan then collided with the reality of a woman fast approaching her centenary and since October 2021 we have had one cancellation after another with the diminutive monarchy increasingly retreating from public view.
We did not see her in Scotland for Cop26, at the Cenotaph on Remembrance Day, on Commonwealth Day, Easter, at the State Opening of parliament or at the service of thanksgiving for her reign during her own Platinum Jubilee.
News that Her Majesty would not be facing down the bouquet-chomping Cruachan IV has only confirmed that things are changing, and fast, for the eleven irrepressible monarch.
However, this is the Queen we are talking about, a woman whose family has, in only the last few years, faced accusations of sexual abuse, racism, accepting millions of dollars from a controversial Middle Eastern politician and the brothers of Osama bin Laden and of “total neglect”.
The dark cloud over her vacation is that, in the months to come, Buckingham Palace faces all of these particular fires roaring back to full on blaze status.
It’s hard to think of a worse headline for any brand or business than one that ties them to the family of Bin Laden, but here we are thanks to Prince Charles and his seeming willingness to accept vast amounts of money for his Prince’s Trust charity from any stray billionaire.
In July it was reported that the Prince had accepted $1.7 million from the two of Bin Laden’s siblings, a shocking revelation that came only weeks after it was also reported by the Times he had accepted $1.7 million in cash stuffed in plastic shopping bags from a controversial Qatari politician.
Meanwhile, his former valet turned charity chief Michael Fawcett is still waiting to be questioned by Scotland Yard’s Special Inquiry Team after allegations of a cash-for-honours scheme embroiled Charles’ Clarence House last year.
Interestingly, the Prince of Wales has largely weathered these damaging reports and come out only slightly reputationally dinged, with the shocking claims have not really sparked any sort of public outcry.
The same likely won’t be able to be said when Prince Harry, the neophyte TV and podcast creator who is yet to actually, err, create anything, releases his memoir later this year.
If even a small percentage of the speculation about what he might reveal and what dirt he might dish is correct, this book is shaping up to be the most devastating royal release in 30 years and since Diana, Princess of Wales started whispering in the ear of Andrew Morton.
Given we are talking about Harry – a man who went on global TV screens alongside his wife Meghan, Duchess of Sussex to accuse The Firm of racism and neglectful treatment at a time when thousands were dying-a-day of Covid and while his 99- year-old grandfather was in hospital – does anyone really think all we are going to get is a feel-good read? Several hundred pages of self-important bleating and the occasional smoothie recipe thrown in?
In Tom Bower’s recently released Revenge: Meghan, Harry and the War Between the Windsors he casts a particularly grim view.
He writes: “Most Britons could not understand Harry’s hostility towards his country and family. His disloyalty from him to his grandmother was particularly mystifying.
“No one realized how his hostility had grown during his conversations with John Moehringer, the ghostwriter of his memoirs. To secure vast sales and recoup the huge advance, the publishers had encouraged Harry to criticize his family of him in the most extreme terms possible. Easily persuaded, Harry edged towards betraying his father to him, Camilla, the Cambridges and even the Queen. And then, the deed was done. To earn out the publisher’s advance, nothing and no one had been sacrosanct.”
Or to paraphrase Macbeth, another disgruntled figure from royal circles, something very dangerous this way comes…
At this stage, all indications would point to Harry’s book potentially being the most painful chapter yet in the long and sorry tale of Megxit.
Then, there is another book, or at least the possibility of a book, that should be a very serious cause for concern for Her Majesty. Six months ago her son de ella Prince Andrew settled the civil sex abuse case brought against him by Virginia Giuffre with a payment that at the time was reported to be around $21 million. (The royal has always vehemently denied Ms Giuffre’s claims that he sexually assaulted her on three occasions when she was a teenager.)
this week The Sun reported that figure was allegedly much lower – somewhere between $5.1 and $8.6 million – and that “that was as much money the disgraced Duke could scrape together quickly to halt her civil lawsuit”.
The “cut-price deal”, according to the report, might explain why the mother-of-three Giuffre did not sign a nondisclosure agreement, meaning she is free to write a tell-all of her very own, any time she wants.
That there is even a skerrick of chance that this chapter, the most sordid and horrifying in modern royal history by far, could at any moment explode back into the headlines must be a cause for very serious concern.
All Andrew has ever done to try and manage this situation is given an appalling TV interview, showing an appealing deficiency of compassion or empathy for anyone but himself, put out a couple of statements and write a seven-figure check. If anyone thinks that this is in any case an adequate response and has drawn a definitive line under his friendship with Jeffrey Epstein, a convicted sex offender, or that the public is ready to move on then they are deluding themselves.
The 62-year-old is still, and will likely always be, despised by much of the world and the appetite for seeing him embarrassed or raked over the coals is unlikely to diminish anytime soon. Cue 101 book publishers with dollar-signs in their eyes.
So too has Ms Giuffre shown a steely backbone and unwavering commitment to speaking about the horrors she experienced during her time with Epstein. There is no reason to believe that she will suddenly back down or go quiet now which leaves us with the very real possibility that she might release a book of her own from her at some point.
Even if all of these swirling worries weren’t enough to blight the Queen’s holiday, then there is the fact that she will have to cut her break short thanks to the fact that the UK will get a new Prime Minister next month. On September 6, Boris Johnson will formally resign and the Daily Mail has revealed that Her Majesty will “interrupt” her holiday to pop back to London where she will “invite”, in the quaint nomenclature of royalty, the winner of the Conservative party vote to form a government.
A source told the Email: “Her Majesty does not expect the new prime minister to travel to Scotland, so the plan is that the Queen will travel down to see them.”
So much for a regal break huh?
Balmoral is agreed to be Her Majesty’s favorite home where she used to enjoy long walks and getting out into nature but in recent years her time there has been blighted by a rolling series of crises. In 2019, August saw Harry and Meghan skip the family getaway to flit about Europe in private jets and then the suicide of Epstein. Come 2020, the pandemic was in full swing and she and Philip were cosseted inside HMS Bubble and last year the monarch faced her first summer de ella without her husband of 73-years.
The poor woman must be so tired. Not only is she still working, more than three decades after most people retire, but her family de ella is a source of never ending scandal and strain with things only looking like they are going to ramp up more.
If you ask me, and no one is, what Her Majesty needs right now is not another wet week wobbling over the moors and ruminating on how it all went wrong but needs to rally her lady-in-waiting of more than 60 years Lady Susan Hussey and abscond for a 72-hour all-inclusive gals weekend to Malaga.
Sun, sand, sangria and not having to think about all the brewing Windsor scandals? Now that’s a real holiday.
Daniela Elser is a royal expert and a writer with more than 15 years’ experience working with a number of Australia’s leading media titles.
WBC heavyweight champion Tyson Fury said he is retiring from boxing on his 34th birthday on Friday, having previously performed a number of U-turns over his future in the sport.
“Massive thanks to everyone who had an input in my career over the years & after long hard conversations I’ve finally decided to walk away & on my 34th birthday I say Bon voyage,” Fury posted on Twitter.
The announcement has been greeted with skepticism as Fury has previously stated his intention to withdraw only to return to the ring.
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He was expected to fight the winner of Oleksandr Usyk’s rematch with Anthony Joshua on August 20 for the chance to unify the world heavyweight titles.
As recently as Tuesday, Fury suggested his most recent spell in retirement was over in order to set up a trilogy fight against Derek Chisora and even claimed to have appointed a new trainer in Isaac Lowe.
However, he has now announced the intention to retire undefeated with a record of 32 wins and one draw from 33 bouts.
LONDON, ENGLAND – APRIL 23: Tyson Fury sits on his throne before entering the ring prior to the WBC World Heavyweight Title Fight between Tyson Fury and Dillian Whyte at Wembley Stadium on April 23, 2022 in London, England. (Photo by Julian Finney/Getty Images)Source: Getty Images
Fury went onto thank his wife, promoter Frank Warren and a series of other training partners and television companies who have bought rights to his fights over the years.
The Brit stated ahead of his win over Dillian Whyte in March that he would retire after that fight as he has “150 million in the bank and nothing to prove.”
However, earlier this week, Warren had cast doubt on the suggestion Fury will not fight again.
“I think what’s going to happen is, see what happens on 20 (August) and the outcome of that, and that’ll determine what he intends to do in the future,’ Warren told talk SPORT.
“I think he will (return), because he’s a fighting man and he misses it. That’s what he does, he wants to fight.”
(FILES) In this file photo taken on April 23, 2022 Britain’s Tyson Fury (R) celebrates after knocking out Britain’s Dillian Whyte.Source: AFP
A Brazilian winger with over 250 Premier League appearances to his name could be returning to the English top flight, while Chelsea boss Thomas Tuchel revealed his admiration for a top transfer target.
Catch up on all of the transfer whispers doing the rounds in the latest edition of the Rumor Mill!
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BRAZILIAN STAR LINKED WITH PL MOVE AFTER MESSY EXIT DUE TO DEATH THREATS
Former Chelsea and Arsenal midfielder Willian quit Corinthians on Saturday (AEST) following the Brazilians’ Copa Libertadores elimination against domestic rivals Flamengo, after claiming he and his family received death threats on social media.
“Willian asked us for his (contract) termination. We are sad not to have him any more and also because it didn’t go the way we expected. But we have to keep those here that are happy,” said club president Duilio Monteiro Alves.
It was only a year ago that the 34-year-old only rejoined the club where he made his professional debut in 2006. Local media have linked him with a move to promoted English Premier League side Fulham.
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The return to Corinthians in Sao Paulo quickly turned sour for Willian both on the pitch where he scored one goal in 45 matches, and off it.
“Whenever Corinthians lost and I didn’t play well, my family received threats and insults on social media. My wife, my children, recently they also started attacking my father, my sister,” Willian told the Globo Esporte website.
“I didn’t play as well as I expected but I was never a player who scored 20 or 30 goals a season,” he told ESPN Brasil on Wednesday.
Willian, who also played for Shakhtar Donetsk in Ukraine and Russians Anzhi Makhachkala, leaves the club three days after they were eliminated from the Copa Libertadores quarter-finals by Flamengo, 3-0 on aggregate
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TUCHEL ‘VERY, VERY CLOSE’ WITH TOP TRANSFER TARGET
Chelsea boss Thomas Tuchel said he will always have a “close bond” with Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang as speculation links the Barcelona forward with a move to Stamford Bridge.
The Blues are looking to reinforce their forward line after the departures of Romelu Lukaku and Timo Werner.
Aubameyang, who only joined Barcelona in January, would appear to fit the bill with both Premier League experience from four years at Arsenal and the time he spent under Tuchel at Borussia Dortmund.
The Gabon international scored 79 goals in 95 appearances under Tuchel.
“This is totally separate from anything that is happening now, but I enjoyed a lot working with Auba while I was at Dortmund,” said Tuchel on Friday at his pre-match press conference ahead of Sunday’s visit of Tottenham.
“Some players stay your players because you were very, very close, and Auba is one of those players.
“There was always straight away this close bond. They always stay your players in a way.”
A behind-the-scenes documentary on Arsenal’s 2021/22 season has revealed the scale of disciplinary breaches that saw Mikel Arteta freeze Aubameyang out of the Gunners’ first-team squad.
However, Tuchel said “there was never an issue” with Aubameyang’s discipline during their time in Germany.
Chelsea has been linked with a move for Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang. (Photo by Pau BARRENA / AFP)Source: AFP
RED DEVILS BOSS QUASHES TALK OF STAR WINGER’S SHOCK EXIT
Erik ten Hag expects Marcus Rashford to remain at Manchester United despite rumors this week that Paris St Germain have made contact with the forward’s representatives.
Rashford’s form dipped dramatically last season as he scored just four goals in 25 Premier League games, which has led to him being dropped from the England squad just months before the World Cup.
The 24-year-old, who has one year left on his contract with a club option for a further year, has twice scored in wins against PSG in the Champions League at the Parc des Princes.
But Ten Hag said he is too important to lose despite his struggle for form, which continued in a 2-1 defeat at home to Brighton in the Dutch coach’s first match in charge last weekend.
“He’s really important,” Ten Hag said. “You have seen from the first day I’m here, I’m really happy with him, I don’t want to lose him.
“He’s definitely in our plans at Manchester United.”
Somewhere in Aberdeenshire there is a sad Shetland pony. Named Lance Corporal Cruachan IV, the diminutive equine usually gets one moment in the spotlight a year, an all-too-brief chance to bask in the glow of global media interest during which he occasionally tries to nip the Queen or eat her bouquet.
As the mascot of the Royal Regiment of Scotland, Cruachan IV usually, at this time of year, enjoys his starring role in the Regiment’s ceremonial welcome of Her Majesty to her Balmoral estate, a traditional outing involving bagpipes and lots of big smiles and which marks the official start of the sovereign’s summer holiday.
But this year both Cruachan IV and the Queen have been kept confined to barracks, so to speak.
This week it was reported that for “reasons of comfort” the ceremonial welcome happened in private but this is just the latest sign that the sovereign’s advancing years and ongoing health woes are posing an increasingly blatant impediment on usual schedule.
News that Her Majesty would not be enjoying her yearly face-to-face with Cruachan IV just tops off what has been a bit of a rotten start to her holiday; a holiday that is already shaping up to be something of a dud thanks to the machinations of Downing Street and her wayward family.
It was only at the tail end of the Queen’s summer holidays last year, a scant 12 months ago or thereabouts, that Buckingham Palace was busy touting what a packed autumn schedule of dozens and dozens of events were planned. The message was clear: The Queen is fighting fit and ready to Queen with some seriously impressive vigor and vim! Trips to Northern Ireland, Wales and Scotland were planned as things geared up towards her big Jubilee year from her!
That ambitious plan then collided with the reality of a woman fast approaching her centenary and since October 2021 we have had one cancellation after another with the diminutive monarchy increasingly retreating from public view.
We did not see her in Scotland for Cop26, at the Cenotaph on Remembrance Day, on Commonwealth Day, Easter, at the State Opening of parliament or at the service of thanksgiving for her reign during her own Platinum Jubilee.
News that Her Majesty would not be facing down the bouquet-chomping Cruachan IV has only confirmed that things are changing, and fast, for the eleven irrepressible monarch.
However, this is the Queen we are talking about, a woman whose family has, in only the last few years, faced accusations of sexual abuse, racism, accepting millions of dollars from a controversial Middle Eastern politician and the brothers of Osama bin Laden and of “total neglect”.
The dark cloud over her vacation is that, in the months to come, Buckingham Palace faces all of these particular fires roaring back to full on blaze status.
It’s hard to think of a worse headline for any brand or business than one that ties them to the family of Bin Laden, but here we are thanks to Prince Charles and his seeming willingness to accept vast amounts of money for his Prince’s Trust charity from any stray billionaire.
In July it was reported that the Prince had accepted $1.7 million from the two of Bin Laden’s siblings, a shocking revelation that came only weeks after it was also reported by the Times he had accepted $1.7 million in cash stuffed in plastic shopping bags from a controversial Qatari politician.
Meanwhile, his former valet turned charity chief Michael Fawcett is still waiting to be questioned by Scotland Yard’s Special Inquiry Team after allegations of a cash-for-honours scheme embroiled Charles’ Clarence House last year.
Interestingly, the Prince of Wales has largely weathered these damaging reports and come out only slightly reputationally dinged, with the shocking claims have not really sparked any sort of public outcry.
The same likely won’t be able to be said when Prince Harry, the neophyte TV and podcast creator who is yet to actually, err, create anything, releases his memoir later this year.
If even a small percentage of the speculation about what he might reveal and what dirt he might dish is correct, this book is shaping up to be the most devastating royal release in 30 years and since Diana, Princess of Wales started whispering in the ear of Andrew Morton.
Given we are talking about Harry – a man who went on global TV screens alongside his wife Meghan, Duchess of Sussex to accuse The Firm of racism and neglectful treatment at a time when thousands were dying-a-day of Covid and while his 99- year-old grandfather was in hospital – does anyone really think all we are going to get is a feel-good read? Several hundred pages of self-important bleating and the occasional smoothie recipe thrown in?
In Tom Bower’s recently released Revenge: Meghan, Harry and the War Between the Windsors he casts a particularly grim view.
He writes: “Most Britons could not understand Harry’s hostility towards his country and family. His disloyalty from him to his grandmother was particularly mystifying.
“No one realized how his hostility had grown during his conversations with John Moehringer, the ghostwriter of his memoirs. To secure vast sales and recoup the huge advance, the publishers had encouraged Harry to criticize his family of him in the most extreme terms possible. Easily persuaded, Harry edged towards betraying his father to him, Camilla, the Cambridges and even the Queen. And then, the deed was done. To earn out the publisher’s advance, nothing and no one had been sacrosanct.”
Or to paraphrase Macbeth, another disgruntled figure from royal circles, something very dangerous this way comes…
At this stage, all indications would point to Harry’s book potentially being the most painful chapter yet in the long and sorry tale of Megxit.
Then, there is another book, or at least the possibility of a book, that should be a very serious cause for concern for Her Majesty. Six months ago her son de ella Prince Andrew settled the civil sex abuse case brought against him by Virginia Giuffre with a payment that at the time was reported to be around $21 million. (The royal has always vehemently denied Ms Giuffre’s claims that he sexually assaulted her on three occasions when she was a teenager.)
this week The Sun reported that figure was allegedly much lower – somewhere between $5.1 and $8.6 million – and that “that was as much money the disgraced Duke could scrape together quickly to halt her civil lawsuit”.
The “cut-price deal”, according to the report, might explain why the mother-of-three Giuffre did not sign a nondisclosure agreement, meaning she is free to write a tell-all of her very own, any time she wants.
That there is even a skerrick of chance that this chapter, the most sordid and horrifying in modern royal history by far, could at any moment explode back into the headlines must be a cause for very serious concern.
All Andrew has ever done to try and manage this situation is given an appalling TV interview, showing an appealing deficiency of compassion or empathy for anyone but himself, put out a couple of statements and write a seven-figure check. If anyone thinks that this is in any case an adequate response and has drawn a definitive line under his friendship with Jeffrey Epstein, a convicted sex offender, or that the public is ready to move on then they are deluding themselves.
The 62-year-old is still, and will likely always be, despised by much of the world and the appetite for seeing him embarrassed or raked over the coals is unlikely to diminish anytime soon. Cue 101 book publishers with dollar-signs in their eyes.
So too has Ms Giuffre shown a steely backbone and unwavering commitment to speaking about the horrors she experienced during her time with Epstein. There is no reason to believe that she will suddenly back down or go quiet now which leaves us with the very real possibility that she might release a book of her own from her at some point.
Even if all of these swirling worries weren’t enough to blight the Queen’s holiday, then there is the fact that she will have to cut her break short thanks to the fact that the UK will get a new Prime Minister next month. On September 6, Boris Johnson will formally resign and the Daily Mail has revealed that Her Majesty will “interrupt” her holiday to pop back to London where she will “invite”, in the quaint nomenclature of royalty, the winner of the Conservative party vote to form a government.
A source told the Email: “Her Majesty does not expect the new prime minister to travel to Scotland, so the plan is that the Queen will travel down to see them.”
So much for a regal break huh?
Balmoral is agreed to be Her Majesty’s favorite home where she used to enjoy long walks and getting out into nature but in recent years her time there has been blighted by a rolling series of crises. In 2019, August saw Harry and Meghan skip the family getaway to flit about Europe in private jets and then the suicide of Epstein. Come 2020, the pandemic was in full swing and she and Philip were cosseted inside HMS Bubble and last year the monarch faced her first summer de ella without her husband of 73-years.
The poor woman must be so tired. Not only is she still working, more than three decades after most people retire, but her family de ella is a source of never ending scandal and strain with things only looking like they are going to ramp up more.
If you ask me, and no one is, what Her Majesty needs right now is not another wet week wobbling over the moors and ruminating on how it all went wrong but needs to rally her lady-in-waiting of more than 60 years Lady Susan Hussey and abscond for a 72-hour all-inclusive gals weekend to Malaga.
Sun, sand, sangria and not having to think about all the brewing Windsor scandals? Now that’s a real holiday.
Daniela Elser is a royal expert and a writer with more than 15 years’ experience working with a number of Australia’s leading media titles.
