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The top 10 worst movie tie-in video games ever

While definitely not as common as they used to be, movie tie-in video games are generally viewed as the absolute bottom of the barrel in terms of video game entertainment.

These are video games created often in short time frames, with limited development cycles, budgets, and anything else that you need in order to make a decent video game.

But, as with anything, some are worse than others.

So here, we have compiled the top 10 (in no particular order) worst of the worst, the rock bottom, the absolute dredge of them all for you to enjoy.

10. E. T. The Extra Terrestrial (1982, Atari)

While older than most people reading this, this game is often credited as having caused the video game market of 1983 to crash. The game itself was boring and bland, featuring awful graphics (even for its time) and repetitive tasks.

Rumor has it that Atari only gave developers five weeks to develop the game for the Christmas season, which would explain the lack of… well, gameplay in the video game. A huge number of these games were returned, Atari fell into bankruptcy, and, as the legend goes, the remainder of the stock was buried in a New Mexico landfill somewhere.

9. Tomorrow Never Dies (1999)

Remember golden eye 64? Remember how much fun it was to stay up late into the night with three of your best friends, getting mad at each other over picking Oddjob, or someone who grabbed the Golden Gun first? Those were good times. What if the next game released in the 007 franchise was worse in every conceivable way?

Tomorrow Never Dies did away with the first-person view, instead choosing a third-person view. The game only featured a story mode, lacking any multiplayer whatsoever. If they had named this game anything else, it probably would have been fine, but coming hot off the heels of the success that golden eye 64 was, it led many to see this as a downgrade in every way.

8. Marvel’s Avengers (2020)

Crystal Dynamics has done some good work in gaming, don’t get me wrong, but avengers fails in a lot of ways that don’t make sense. The launch of avengers had some serious game-breaking bugs tethered to it, and while most of them have been ironed out over its lifespan, one of the game’s core problems hasn’t been – how content dry and unrewarding it is to play.

The game has a decent story mode, but once you complete it, the only way to progress is to complete multiplayer missions, which are the same boring, repetitive missions that every other games-as-a-service game has. The multiplayer is not fun, and that’s the biggest advertising point of the game. Please just make another Legacy of Kain game, Crystal Dynamics.

7. Saw 2: Flesh and Blood (2010)

“Hey, what if we took a movie that was relatively unique in the horror genre for its interesting puzzles and turned it into a boring action video game?” said the developers of Saw 2: Flesh and Blood. I may be paraphrasing.

The puzzles are boring, the dialogue is boring, you’re having to repeat puzzles often because they do not explain how the puzzles work, and the majority of downtime in between puzzles are filled with quick-timed events. Low amounts of checkpoints means that you’re often having to redo several rooms multiple times.

6. Cat Woman (2004)

Not unlike the movie of the same name, cat woman did extremely poorly with critics and players alike.

Genuinely awful voice acting combined with seemingly malfunctioning camera controls and a mash-one-button-until-you-win combat style made this game an easy one to pass up.

5. Street Fighter: The Movie: The Game (1995)

In the games industry, there’s an unfortunate expectation that a video game made to tie in with a movie is gonna suck. So what happens when a movie is made based on a video game – that is then turned into a video game itself? It’s like an inception of bad video games.

This soulless shell of a game lacks even the most basic things that Street Fighter II had, namely its charm. Seeing Dhalsim stretch-punch or Ryu throw Hadoukens is timeless, but seeing digitized versions of the actors playing these characters doing the same is just painful.

4. James Cameron’s Avatar: The Game (2009)

Picture this: you’ve just seen Avatar in theaters, and it was a wondrous journey through what cinematic effects can look like in 2009. You can’t get over how cool the fight scenes were, how beautiful the landscapes were, or how intricate the sex-hair thing was. So you rush to your local store and immediately spy a copy of Avatar: The Game. Surely it must look just as good, right?

While the game does tackle events prior to the movie, expanding the lore of the world a bit, the graphics looked awful – I can think of a few late-gen PS2 games that looked nicer – the gameplay was bland and repetitive, made worse by the linear paths you have to walk in the game.

3. Evil Dead: Hail to the King

I cannot imagine watching Evil Dead 2having a wonderful time, and then picking this game up and trying to play through it. Hail to the King lacks pretty much everything that made Evil Dead 2 or Army of Darkness work, instead attempting to emulate some action-horror games that had come out before it.

Fixed camera angles are fine in some games, but the game has to be built around them for it to work. This game has problems with enemies swarming you, and you are unable to deal with them due to the camera perspectives.

2. Every Shrek Game That Isn’t Shrek SuperSlam

I don’t really have the energy to go into why all but one of the Shrek games are bad. In short, they’re poorly paced, have game-breaking bugs, are boring and feature repetitive gameplay. Instead, I want to focus on why SuperSlam is a great game.

SuperSlam is technically a bad game, in terms of gameplay and execution. It’s a broken platform/arena fighter, with several characters able to commit to ‘infinite’ combos that generally just make it unfun – in theory.

What makes it fun is that an entire competitive esports community has formed around the broken game, figuring out how the game works within how broken it is. To this day, tournaments are held online, with new players joining in to try to win.

1. Aliens: Colonial Marines (2013)

This one is a pain for me, personally. Alien is such a cool series, with a lot of lore and a lot of good horror sequences – Alien: Isolation is arguably my favorite movie tie-in game because of how oppressive and well-done the horror in that game is. Enter Colonial Marines: a game with broken AI, to the point where Aliens will crab-walk right past you while they try to figure out their pathing, or get caught in level geometry because the developers couldn’t figure out hitbox collision. The graphics were extremely bland for their time, especially when you compare it to the alpha footage that leaked before release, which looked incredible.

What’s worse, however, is the vast number of promises that the developers gave prerelease that were simply not true. It was a giant mess from beginning to end, and Alien fans the world over were truly disappointed.

Written by Junior Miyai on behalf of GLHF.

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Categories
Sports

Oscar Piastri future; showdown with Alpine, Daniel Ricciardo McLaren, Lewis Hamilton turned down role in Top Gun

Alpine is reportedly set for a legal showdown with Oscar Piastri amid reports the Australian driver will join McLaren next season.

The 21-year-old was announced last week as Fernando Alonso’s replacement at Alpine only for Piastri to take to social media to declare he would not be driving for the team.

It came amid reports that McLaren had told Daniel Ricciardo he would not have a seat in 2023.

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Alpine team principal Otmar Szafnauer said they could seek compensation, expected to be in the millions.

“Going to the High Court is over 90 per cent certain that’s what we’ll do,” he told Reuters.

“If the [board] says ‘your license is only valid at Alpine’ and then he [Piastri] says ‘that’s great but I’m never driving for them, I’ll just sit out a year,’ then you’ve got to go to the High Court for compensation.”

Szafnauer said Alpine would assess how much money they have invested in Piastri’s development.

This figure would include the costs associated with independent tests as well as thousands of kilometers in the team’s 2021 car.

According to Reuters, one power unit costs as much as $2.55 million (AUD)

“We haven’t sat down with the accountants to figure out everything we’ve spent,” said Szafnauer.

“We will have to do that if we go to the High Court.”

According to TheRace.com, the fact Alpine believe the matter will head to the court implies that the team is resigned to losing Piastri to McLaren with their focus now on compensation rather than holding onto its rising star.

Oscar Piastri has said he will not drive for Alpine in 2023.
Oscar Piastri has said he will not drive for Alpine in 2023.Source: Getty Images

HAMILTON’S REVEALS BIG HOLLYWOOD BLOW

Lewis Hamilton has sensationally revealed he had to turn down a role as a fighter pilot in Top Gun: Maverick, describing it as “the most upsetting call” he’s ever made.

The seven-time world champion counts himself as a good friend of actor Tom Cruise, who played the lead role in the 1986 original and the recent Hollywood blockbuster that has grossed a whopping $AUD1.8 billion.

Hamilton recalls being invited to the set of one of Cruise’s movies as the starting point of their friendship.

“One of the nicest people you’ll ever meet,” Hamilton told Vanity Fair.

“He invited me to his set years ago when he was doing Edge of Tomorrow, and then we just built a friendship over time.”

Once Hamilton caught wind a Top Gun sequel was in the works, he was desperate to be involved given his love of the film as a child.

“So when I heard the second one was coming out, I was like, ‘Oh my god, I have to ask him,’” Hamilton said.

Tom Cruise bumps fists with Lewis Hamilton before the British GP at Silverstone. (Photo by Lars Baron/Getty Images)Source: Getty Images

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“I said, ‘I don’t care what role it is. I’ll even sweep something, be a cleaner in the back.’”

Cruise obliged, but he wasn’t going to give Hamilton a cameo appearance.

Instead, the megastar wanted the Mercedes driver to be one of the fighter pilots.

There was just one catch: filming was set to take place during the back-end of the 2021 F1 season when Hamilton was locked in a tense battle with Max Verstappen for the world championship.

Knowing he had to turn down the chance of a lifetime, Hamilton was devastated when he made the call.

“I’m a perfectionist,” Hamilton said.

“The most upsetting call that I think I’ve ever had.”

F1 TRACK SET TO MAKE APPEARANCE IN … CALL OF DUTY?

Christmas has come early for the cross section of F1 and Call of Duty fans.

Infinity Ward, the developers of the video game, released a trailer that confirmed the Marina Bay Circuit in Singapore will be a playable map in the latest edition of the famous franchise.

In an official statement, Infinity Ward confirmed the map would be playable in the Modern Warfare II Beta for fans to get a taste of what’s to come.

“The Modern Warfare II Beta is set to feature a robust multiplayer experience going beyond the Core 6v6 experience with a variety of meticulously designed maps of various sizes, and an equally impressive set of Modes, Progression experiences, and other aspects that will be more thoroughly revealed at Call of Duty: Next,” the statement read.

“In addition, we revealed a fly-through of Marina Bay Grand Prix, where combat occurs within the main infield of an urban race circuit, one of the 6v6 Multiplayer maps confirmed for the Beta.”

The pit lane in Singapore will look a little different in this year’s Call of Duty. (Photo by Lars Baron/Getty Images)Source: Getty Images

There does not look to be any official F1 branding or names of the drivers, suggesting it is not an official partnership between them and Call of Duty.

Funnily enough, the worlds of F1 and Call of Duty have intertwined previously, as Lewis Hamilton was a non-playable character in Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare, released in 2016.

LONG LIVE VEGAS! F1’S FIRST DATE IN SIN CITY LEAKED

What happens in Vegas might very well have great implications in the title race as the date for the Las Vegas GP has been leaked.

A Letter of Intent for the race between Liberty Media and the Convention Bureau was posted on Twitter and eagle-eyed fans noted the date.

The Las Vegas GP is slated to take place on November 18 and it would remain on that date until 2027 when the contract expires.

Based on the current F1 calendar, it would mean the race in Sin City would be the penultimate race of the season as the Abu Dhabi GP will take place on November 20 this year.

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Categories
Entertainment

UNO update gives controversial new meaning to ‘Skip’ cards

We’ve all been that person on the end of the UNO battering ram.

No matter what you do, the cards just won’t line up, leaving you as the poor sod forced to pick up half the deck in shame.

And there’s always someone at the table explaining how their rule “makes the game better”.

But now, the company behind the iconic card game has revealed a cheeky rule that is sure to spark debate.

UNO says players can avoid the dreaded “Draw 2” cards by plonking a “Skip” card on the pile, but only if they’re the same color.

“Skipping never felt so good,” wrote the official UNO Twitter account. “If someone plays a Draw 2 on you and you have a Skip card of the SAME COLOR in your hand, you can play it and ‘bounce’ the penalty to the next player!”

UNO also said if the next player has a Skip card of any colour, they can play it and kick the penalty down to the next player.

“The next player must draw the two cards, unless they have a Skip card (of any colour) they can play, in which case they pass the penalty to the next player and so on until no one has a Skip card and must draw two cards.”

UNO reminded players that they can’t stack cards on top of one another.

“You can only play one card per turn – stacking is not allowed!”

But some fans weren’t too pleased with the update.

“Absolutely not,” one person replied. “I’ve lost enough friendships over fighting this exact rule. I can’t find this in the rule book — surely this is fake!”

But others admitted it was in their personalized rule book all along.

“This is standard — why are so many people shocked?” one fan said. “The UNO video game uses this rule as well, it’s legit.”

In 2019, Mattel launched a new version of UNO to add some extra spice to the mix.

UNO Flip is a more competitive and rage-inducing version of the classic game.

The entire deck is double-sided, featuring a “light side” resembling the original game and a “dark side”, where penalties are far tougher.

If you score a “Flip” card the game is entirely in your hands and you gain the power of revealing a new set of numbers and colors on the other side.

And as always, never forget to shout “UNO” when you’re down to your last card.

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